Effy — Part 1

Sophy says: Kaya + eyeliner + smoke. An unbeatable combination. Although I feel Skins rested its laurels on her beauty a bit with this credit sequence. It’s not quite as dazzlingly thoughtful as Naomi’s, for instance.

Rin says: I don’t know, it’s a pretty thoughtful credit sequence if we think of the eyeliner as the character. 8-.


Sophy says: Ah, nothing like a bit of zombie-sex to start the day.

Rin says: All I remember when capping this is getting really frustrated that she wouldn’t stay still…she was making the caps blurry!


Sophy says: Cook made enough noise for both of them. Effy manages a small smile and a “Wow” that is far less enthusiastic than any of Cassie’s.

Watch and learn, Effy, watch and learn.

Rin says: Wait.. what is that in that second cap I .. oh the horror.

Sophy says: I know. I see it too.

Rin says: Sophome Sophome Sophome. I’m incredibly split in my feelings about you.

Sophy says: I know right. Sometimes you’re just marveling at her jeanshorts and pipe combo, and other times you just wish Crookshanks would chase her off the property :)

Rin says: Harry Potter references look good on you.



Sophy says: They dress, Cook with more efficient swiftness than Effy, and at this point I’m trying to repress the fact that he is reminding me of Bill’s mum from Big Love again. Still, kudos to Rin for catching the flicker of sad-little-boy on Cook’s face in this otherwise calculatedly clinical scene.

Rin says: God I really need to catch up on Big Love. Amongst 50 other million tv shows. :-. Cook’s little faceeeee.



Sophy says: He leaves, pronto, with the kind of ‘see you later’ that’s worthy of a one night stand with a stranger, and Effy turns around like she’s surprised and not surprised at the same time. What I get from her face in this moment is that she wishes she could be sad that for all the connecting, they’re not connecting… but she can’t, because she’s too sad about everything else in the world, and hey, not connecting is what she does.

Rin says: What the fuck is that Naomily themed duck. Creep.


Sophy says: Whoa, nice sex-sillhouette. I never noticed that before, but I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that it’s Tony’s and has been there all along. For all Effy’s promiscuity, she’s never been quite as gleefully self-aware about it as Tony was.

A pale girl in a pale bathroom, a small figure against a vast expanse of wall.

Rin says: On one hand I really adore the composition of the frame…and on the other. :(

I just upset myself.

Sophy says: Oh God, I don’t like what this gathering obsession with Naomi is doing to Effy. I worry.


Freddie’s dyslexia helpline. Please leave a massage.

Sophy says: She calls Freddie, and this is Effy being brave. This is as close to Emily Fitch as she gets… but he’s not answering.

Rin says: Freddie’s voice mail is so embarrassingly dorky. And look at all of her friends, or not really. I understand JJ not being in her phone, but where’s um, you know, Cook? Even Naomi has Cook in her phone.

Sophy says: Seriously, if that scrollbar is anything to go by, no one should ever having been labeling Effy a “Queen Bee”.



Rin says: I guess she took the whole ‘if I saved you from drowning’ thing a little too literally.

Sophy says: Fffffff, it’s like watching a trainwreck.



Sophy says: Effy comes down the stairs looking profoundly ill, both emotionally and physically. Any parent who saw their kid looking like that would be boiling the kettle for a hot water bottle and making an appointment with a counsellor. But Anthea Stonem’s not just any parent is she. 8-)

And the song that’s been playing since the episode opened is very interesting. It’s about as gooey as Skins music gets – a ballad, a pure female voice, the refrain All I need is a little more of you to go on… And it works beautifully, from the deeply ironic opening line during the empty sex scene with Cook – Spent enough time in your arms to know just where I want to be – leading into the phonecall to Freddie, leading all the way down the stairs to her perpetually preoccupied mother, with a plaintive I’m right beside you…

Rin says: I love that song, and it does work perfectly with this scene. The softness isn’t jarring whatsoever, and it’s the contrast that makes it so suitable.


Sophy says: Anthea’s busy rabbiting on about how men are bastards, even though she’s the one who screwed Mr S over, but nevermind, she’s in bitch mode, and even Stephen Fry’s feeling her wrath.

STEPHEN FRY’S A BASTARD??? WHAT ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND, ANTHEA???

Stephen Fry should adopt Effy and me. We They could be witty and clever and swap tales of their crippling mental illness.

(I’m not saying I have a crippling mental illness, but I could probably try and catch one?)

Meanwhile, Lucy Kirkwood or the director or someone in the creative team, whoever it was, gets full marks for the ‘Thank you, Bono, says Africa’ story in the paper.

Amazing.

Rin says: You have a new found love for Stephen Fry as well, cause he reads Harry Potter to you. :)

Sophy says: Pfff, if anything Fry earned Potter some points.


Sophy says: Effy tries to get her mother’s attention, and I get the impression that it’s mostly out of interest to see what it will take. She says she and Cook broke up which elicits an ‘aww’. She then casually mentions that she’s having his baby and gets an ‘Mmhmm’. And hey, that was a pretty weak attempt, Effy – if she doesn’t mind you shagging him upstairs while she sips her tea, then she’s probably not too fussed about your life turning into an after school special.

Rin says: Oh god, who looks more of a mess right now? It’s pretty close.

And I don’t mean in a hot Emily ‘307’ Fitch mess.


Sophy says: A little experimental smashing does the trick – sort of. She still doesn’t get much out of Anthea, but at least she turns around. Progress.

Rin says: I’m not sure how comfortable I am with you using the word ‘experimental’ around Effy…she’s going to start telling Naomi she’s all about experiments. :(( I love how she immediately resorts to breaking something though.


Sophy says: Effy’s smile here it’s absolutely amazing. It’s 100% gen 1 Effy, punctuating a very gen 1 Effy scene. The only difference is that here she’s a mess – not a studiedly scruffy kittenish hot mess the way she was back then – a real bags-under-the-eyes, makeupless, grubby-haired mess.

But still, there it is. The mask. The Shiva-like superiority. A false serenity inside her false self.

Rin says: It’s like she was almost checking to see if this area of her life was still as fucked up as ever, and she gets a little bit of power, a little bit of control because it’s familiar. She’s been dealing with ~Anthea for a while now, unlike what she’s about to go do. If you compare the smirk from Effy here with the caps a bit further down, Effy in Fred’s shed, the difference is pretty gargantuan.


Sophy says: Effy makes her exit to a comical Russian folk tune, and Anthea puffs away like a disgruntled factory worker.

Rin says: God I love these two caps. By the way? The pattern of Anthea’s dressing gown?? Foreshadowing.

OH and of course.




Sophy says: Freddie’s garden, Freddie’s shed. And I lied before – this is Effy doing her best Emily Fitch. It’s not perfect, because she’s left a mess behind her – the broken glass on the floor, the boy who’s busy in the gateau aisle… but she’s trying. She’s reaching out. And as she clenches her fists, as she takes a moment and a breath at the shed door, you can see how difficult it is for her to ask to be let in.

Rin says: Her balled up fists are pretty amazing. Is this the first time, in 3 seasons, that Effy is actually pursuing something that she wants? Where we see her physically unsure of herself, and you get the sense that she doesn’t even know why she’s here or what she’s going to say, but she just needed to go. It was just time.


Sophy says: She closes her eyes, and when she opens them she’s not exactly thrilled with what she’s seeing.

Rin says: Even though she looks a bit matted and manky, her eyes look insanely gorgeous in that light.


Sophy says: Katie finds this farcical situation they’re suddenly in terrifically amusing, peering out all baby seal-like over Freddie’s shoulder. Freddie’s not quite so delighted, and he takes a moment before turning around to face this girl he ran to in 305, this girl he’s been running from ever since.

Can I just say how perfect Effy’s sillhouette in the background is here? Her stance is defiantly open, her head high – but her eyes are downcast, her fingers are still in fists, struggling to keep a grip on her dignity – or what’s left of it anyway.

Rin says: Let’s all first be thankful that Sophia hasn’t been manipped onto Katie here. I’m still pretty upset over that one, Sophy. Learn to lock your shed Freddie, or even a ‘DO NOT DISTURB’ sign would suffice to avoid awkward situations like so.


Sophy says: Katie says Effy looks like microwaved shit, and this cap makes it seem a lot sweeter than it really is. The fact is that Katie is enjoying this all a little too much – so much that it’s becoming more and more obvious that this is what she’s been waiting for, at least on some level. I’m convinced by her glee that getting into Freddie’s pants was at least in part about getting a rise out of Effy. A power play, if you will.

Katie’s going to end up with a rock to her head. But Effy’s going to end up psychotic so… call it even? Feel free to decide for yourselves whether winning Freddie’s heart is a plus or a minus for Effy.

Rin says: Purple socks.

Also I totally checked to see if that plaid shirt draped over the couch was the same one Effy wears in 408… it’s not. CLOSE, but no fanwanking.

Rin says: Well there’s a whole new level of disgusting.

Sophy says: I know right.



Sophy says: Oh baby-seal Katie. Even when you’re being a faux-oblivious bitch, you’re still cute.

Rin says: Freddie and Katie, even if they put more effort into making the relationship more realistic, it still wouldn’t have worked. There’d be too many damn pattern clashes.


Sophy says: Hand-holding. Effy does not approve of this. And whilst I’m willing to believe that Katie is naturally this couply, I also can’t help but see her as rubbing it in in every way she can think of.

Rin says: I’m so excited for when we get to dissect Katie more in-depth next recap. Watching s3 the first time round, it’s easy to push Katie aside and just label her as the shallow, bitchy, one-dimensional character. And while yeah, I do believe there’s no competition between S4 and S3 Katie, it is nice to go back and look at Katie with both S3 and S4 goggles. You really do start to see all these glimpses of the Katie who worked to keep her family together, forced her sister to let her comfort her, who saved Effy from the crowd, stayed overnight with her at the clinic…annnd I could go on. Having said all that, yeah…she’s just being a bitch right now. :)


Sophy says: HAHAHAH LOOK AT THAT SMILE. She may as well have just said ‘Mum, Dad. Big news… We’re pregnant!’

Aaaaand I just realized that after 404 that’s never going to happen and feel guilty.

Moving on. Katie tells Effy that she and Freddie are having a party in the woods, and asks if she can drive them. Effy very stoically says she’ll have to ask her mum if she can borrow the car.

Rin says: ‘I’ll have to see if I can borrow the car…..and then plan how to strategically crash so you’re the only one who dies. Or maybe I’ll just take a rock to your head.’


Sophy says: Katie puts her best ‘sensitive information’ face on and informs Effy that Cook’s not invited. Either no one informed Katie that they’re just fuck-buddies, or Katie’s rubbing the whole I’m with the one you want, you can have the “repulsive” one you don’t love thing in again. Probably a bit of a column A/column B thing.

Rin says: Did they give Katie those black hair extensions so people would know she’s the bad twin?


Rin says: That’s right Freddie, stay out of the way or you might get pissed on.

Sophy says: lol, he’s not Cook. Bats are more of a worry for him than urine, I think.


Sophy says: I love Freddie’s face here. He looks resentful and puppyish at the same time.

Rin says: That’s what you see? I’m looking at the spliff and thinking it looks like an oversized cotton bud.


Rin says: Dear lord that is so Keffy.

Sophy says: You know, it really, really is…



Rin says: ‘WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?’ Hahahaha. She would totally let out an exasperated sigh.

Poor Freds. It all happened so quickly…right under his nose!



Sophy says: Katie says she’s going to take a shower, and I’m almost surprised she didn’t think to add COUPLE COUPLE COUPLE! for good measure.

Rin says:


This is Katie’s equivalent of a shimmy, mmmk?

Sophy says: It’s more attractive than my shimmy.

Rin says: Oh hey now, don’t be like that. Your shimmy was fantastic.


Rin says: Freddie says he’ll trundle along soon, all open faced and lovely. And he’s left with just Effy and he goes all questioning-face.

Sophy says: He is beautiful here. He’s beautiful and they are both so young.


Sophy says: “You should come,” Freddie says. “You want me to come?” Effy asks, and it’s as loaded as you’d expect.

Meanwhile, Freds’ expression in that first cap put me in mind of something I meant to make for the last recap…

Seriously, if I didn’t ship them already… ♥

Rin says: Freddie has every right to be a little snarky and short with Effy. What did you expect Effy? You gave him the most ‘fuck you’ response you could think of after he told you so now you know how he felt. And ever since then it’s been the same.

HEHE MUPPETS. Also, it’s interesting how they’re both doing their muppet faces to their respective beaus. Their gay beaus.

Sophy says GAYBOWS. /foreshadowing :)



Sophy says: Freddie asks what Effy’s doing here, and Effy says she came to tell him something.

“Yeah?” he asks.

“Shed’s changed,” she says, and she means Last time I was here it was you-and-me and Cook ruining it all, this time it’s you-and-Katie and I’m the one barging in, aren’t I?

Freddie pushes, because he’s pretty sure she was going to say something a little less shed-specific, but she just heads for the door – “See you later,” just what Cook said to her earlier – and she’s gone.

Rin says: Both of their hairs (?) are in a marriage of greasy harmony right now. I wonder if they put body lotion in it.

Sophy says: I think I’d say ‘hair’. Hairs just makes me think of whiskers, idk.


Rin says: The camera loves his big doughy face. *smooshes*

Sophy says: Gah, his expression in that first cap is just beautiful. It’s all confused-longing and resigned-renewed. You can do that trick on it that I mentioned with Emily in 304. Cover one side of his face and he’s skeptical, the other side and he’s all filled with boyish hope.


Rin says: The direction here was so perfect. The way she rushes into scene, and we get right up into her face. We feel that rush of emotion as Effy does, how she was putting all of her energy into not feeling and as soon as she gets out, boom. It’s like being hit over the head with a……. *coughs*




Rin says: The music and the jump cuts. Guh. Perfect scene.




Sophy says: And that’s where my heart breaks. It broke a little on first viewing because seeing someone hurt so much that they throw up is the kind of thing that gets to me, but now… knowing what I know about the things that are torturing Effy… it completely trashes the place. Because it doesn’t matter how many dark, dull, deadening things she’s been repeating to herself since that moment in the lake where she touched her lips and knew that she had jumped in… that’s her person. She’s been sure, on some small, hidden, and very very terrified level, that Freddie is her person, since the moment she first saw him, if poetic license allows, since the moment she saw him bundle JJ into the car, if we’re being real.

And now he’s pretending to be someone else’s, and it’s wrong and ridiculous and yet far, far too real, and I think Emma Woodhouse might have vomited onto her shoes after that little chat she had with Harriet Smith, if she hadn’t been quite so lady-like.

If I didn’t love Effy so much, if I didn’t understand her so much, I’d be haha-ing all over the place and talking about getting a taste of your own medicine.

But as it is all I can feel is wrecked for her and a little bit vomitty myself :(

Rin says: VOMIT MY SOPHY! VOMIT FOR ME!

Sophy says: OMFG Rin just referenced Dan Bergstein. This is a great day.


Sophy says: Ew, vomit shoes, thanks for the reality, Skins. As if Effy wasn’t enough of a mess before.

Rin says: I feel like she should have been wearing socks anyway, but then I’m glad that she didn’t cause can you imagine? SOGGY VOMITTY SOCKS? That might just be the worst.


Sophy says: I love, love, love and adore that Effy just puts the shoes in the bin – throw it all out, there’s nothing here to be salvaged…

But I guess she sleeps on it and decides that no matter how much hand-holding goes on or how many parties are co-hosted or many showers Katie takes, Freddie is still going to be hers at the end of the day.

So when they set off the next morning, it’s a tight, bright smile a piece. It’s game on.

Rin says: I really love the shoes in the bin too. It reminds me of gen 1 Effy, where she would store her sexyfit in the bin outside.


Sophy says: Katie is baby-sealing with her map and JESUS Freddie is the biggest dork on the planet. ♥

(And I think maybe he’s trying to impress Effy with some dance moves Naomi taught him?)

Effy is stony and silently purposeful.

Rin says: Oh please, just because we can hardly see Naomi, they think the cuteness is just gonna swoop under the radar. Sorry, but, this is my job. *gets scope*

WHAT ARE NAOMILY DOING?! They’re just fooling around being ridiculously cute. Emily takes the duffel bag and puts it between Effy/Katie, then immediately takes it back and tries to, I don’t know…SUFFOCATE NAOMI?? Then she proceeds to laugh her ass off. Oh you guys.

Sophy says: GOD BLESS THE RINSCOPE!

And screw you, Effy/Car-seat! [-(

Rin says: They should have put Naomi and Emily in the middle ffs. Or I guess Naomi wanted to sit on the outside of Emily.


Sophy says: And here we have it, Cook’s first attempt to be a couple with Effy. It’s a little late for a first date when you’ve fucked a girl on the school nurse’s desk, in a cupboard at a pyjama party, on her bed while her mum has her cornflakes downstairs… but still. He’s making an effort, and it’s jarring, and it’s sweet, and it’s a little bit tragic too.

Rin says: I agree that it’s a little bit too late for salmon and gateau’s, but I appreciate the effort all the same. I mean, it’s the first time we see him more interested in spending time with Effy than having sex with her.



Rin says: Karookie. I’ve missed you. Look at his little smile. <333

Also *Gateau Whispers* ? Yeah, I imagine them to sound like Ringwraiths.

Sophy says: What is it about Karookie that brings out the LOTR nerd in you???

And as heartily as I approve of this scenario, I think there’s someone else Cook might have tried first…

Rin says: YES. IT’S BACK. <333 ‘Marie-Cruz’ over and over again is epic. Oh Sucre.



Rin says: I LOVE that he presses the buzzer with his nose. That’s so adorbs.

Sophy says: Adorable and practical! ♥


Sophy says: Oh lord, that second cap is so adorable I’m almost able to overlook the ubiquitous buttoned up golf-shirt. Almost.

Anyway, Cook tells Anthea her daughter’s in for a fookin’ treat – “Four courses, fancy stuff!” Anthea rather hazily replies that Effy’s out for the night – they’ve all gone to a party at Gobbler’s End.

Rin says: He’s so happy and pleased with his food choices.


Sophy says: Cook is not pleased. “Nah,” he says “We were supposed to hang out tonight.” And I’m not sure exactly how he got dinner plans from a failure to reply to “See you later,” but still, ouch – this has gotta hurt.

Rin says: Maybe you should have baked the cake yourself. I’d totally cancel a camping trip for some home-made cake. From Emily.

Sophy says: WOULD YOU TURN DOWN A DATE WITH LILY LOVELESS FOR MUM’S LAMB ROAST???

Rin says: WHAT? WHERE IS THIS COMING FROM? And I don’t like to eat lamb.

Sophy says Oh god, are you seriously too young to know about those ads?????? D: Excuse me… I just… need a moment to myself.




Sophy says: Anthea asks if the hanging out thing was organized before or after they broke up, and Cook responds with “I bought a gateau.” When Anthea just stands there, he adds incredulously, “Black forest!”

And then she fucking just takes the cake and shuts the door on him, and seriously. No. New levels of fail, Anthea. But I guess since she spends half the time failing to care about her own kid, I don’t see why I’d expect her to show any kindness to someone else’s.

Rin says: Anthea…fffffffff. YOU’RE REALLY HORRIBLE, lol. Why are you taking the cake, you bitch!

Sophy says: IDK SHE’S JUST HORRIBLE :((



Rin says: I don’t know if he’s surprised about everyone going on a trip without him and not telling him, or just about Effy? I’m thinking it’s both, but it’s interesting how this immediately equates to him knowing Effy doesn’t want him anymore. Like he was always just waiting with a ski mask and a torch, waiting to give her a leaving party.

Sophy says: I think it’s a mixture of everything really. The Effy thing is bad enough, but the party is just rejection on all fronts. Too bad that cloud of blondes stopped following him around somewhere along the way.



Rin says: I, really, can’t, look, at, Panda, in, the, same, way, ever, again.

Sophy says: This will be explained in due course. Rin’s just getting ahead of herself.


Rin says: Oh my god, panda. I spot a braid. Maybe I can overlook it. Maybe I can be helped?

Sophy says: Somehow, I very much doubt that… *eyes you skeptically*

Rin says: If you don’t believe in me, how do you ever expect me to get better.


Rin says: Emily does look really lonely (AND SO POCKETSIZED) in that second cap. Oh Naomily. Cheeky.

Sophy says: When I first made that macro I used the full version of that second last cap without quite realizing how it would look… Rin was so appalled by the macro and it took me ages to figure out why. I was like ‘What’s so wrong with Naomily getting their kink on :(‘ and she was all ‘DNW THREESOME.’ and I was all ‘OH LOL NO OMG. Panda is just looking askance at them :-j

Then I couldn’t unsee and had to change the cap.



Rin says: I know that road!!! I’ve seen that road before!!!

Rin says: Oh Naomily, you’re so cute when you’re taunting Effy.

Sophy says: Okay now they are just being cruel.


Sophy says: Panda gets a call from Cook, no doubt asking what the deal is with this party he’s not invited to. She gets rid of him as quickly as she can, babbling things like “Can’t talk now, mum!” Unfortunately, Thomas saw the caller ID on the phone. He’s not impressed. But he doesn’t let on, opting to keep the peace instead, for now at least. Opting to give Pandora one more chance to block his calls and stop seeing him, or to tell him the truth herself or both.

They exchange awkward smiles, and Lisa does a wonderful job of looking guilty once she’s turned back around.

Rin says: I don’t get why she didn’t just block the call. I guess it is Pandora.



Sophy says: They stop at a service station, because Katie’s map is failing her and they have no idea where they’re going.

Rin says: Poor Katie, she watched too much Dora The Explorer and got ahead of herself.


Rin says: Fucking hell. I just love that we get to love Katie now, because we know where she ends up, so we get to stare at her adoringly as she stuffs the map into the bin and throws out her hands in a ‘SIX SEATER TABLE’ manner.

Well okay, we won’t love her later on when she’s slapping and spitting on a drugged up Effy… but you know. Maps. Such as.

Sophy says: She and Freddie are so cute here, bickering via the means of gestures. In a parallel universe I would have loved to see their relationship play itself out. Is there fic? Someone needs to write hilarious Fratie fic in which they both six-seater-table a lot.


Excuse me gentlemen, could you tell me how to get to Gobbler’s End please?

Rin says: You can always bank on Katie flirting her way to the answer.

Sophy says: Seriously, she’s practically swinging side to side and doing this ;;). And her little clasped hands. Fff.


Rin says: Freddie retrieves the scrunched up map and is ready to get some help from this lovely bald headed fella. Who’s wearing gloves. You should never trust a man who wears gloves.

Sophy says: First shoes, now gloves… what is your problem with people covering their extremities???

Anyway, Mr Gloves takes a look at the map and draws our attention to the blow-job joke in their party location, by saying ‘Gobbler’s Knob’. “End,” Freddie corrects him, but the damage is done.


Rin says: I’m so glad that I can use Hermione in macros now. So glad. IT’S A NEW AGE. Sophy will be glad that she’s lived through another age.

Sophy says: HAHAHAHAH LOOK AT HER LITTLE FACE. Divination is woolly ♥ LIKE A SHEEP ♥

Rin says: I LOVE WOOL AND I LOVE SHEEP, but I wouldn’t take Divination because Hermione doesn’t take Divination.


Sophy says: It’s too bad Cook isn’t here, or these two could have compared scary tattoos. Cook would win.

Rin says: I still haven’t recovered from that tattoo.


Sophy says: LMAO, I had to make Rin go back and make caps of this. SOMEONE WANTS TO MAKE JJ HIS LITTLE BITCH.

Rin says: That’s. Gross.


Sophy says: Katie pops into the station shop, idk, I guess she wants a twix or something. The creepy-ass dude helping Freddie with the map says he’s going to show them something before they go, and promptly fetches a friggin’ rifle.

Rin says: Right so, I need to know what’s the deal with this abandoned petrol station. WHERE IS THE PERSON WHO OWNS IT. It’s really upsetting to me. :( It reminds me of Texas Chainsaw Massacre, although I don’t even know how because I spent most of the movie with my hands over my eyes and have managed to block out most of it from my memory.

Sophy says: Rin, you are such a wimp. I can’t believe your horror of horror movies is going to prevent you from seeing my favourite movie of all time.

Rin says: I just really hate the feeling of being scared, like, it means that I don’t sleep at night. If I don’t watch scary movies then NOBODY SCARES MY HEART. AND ANYWAY, WHY WOULD I WANT THAT?


Rin says: AND THIS GUY. WHAT IS THIS GUYS PROBLEM? I was seriously worried for Katie during this scene. It is NOT funny to kid around with teenage girls like this.

Sophy says: Yeah this wasn’t even a lolzing matter, srs. Regardless of whether these dudes turn out to be pranksters rather than actual axe-murderers, the way he blocked and teased Katie was just really upsetting.


Rin says: Don’t point at the man with the gun Freddie. Just don’t. :(

Sophy says: :(


Rin says: …Honestly JJ. I could fucking backhand you right now. I only included the cap for Blurnaom. And Emily and Naomi… just. Like. I. Words. Escaping.

Sophy says: I guess he’s just practicing for the epic Naomily-cap-ruining he’s going to do later. 8-)


Sophy says: Upsetting, upsetting, upsetting. Also why is she smiling in that second cap???

Rin says: Hahaha. You’re going to suffer…but you’re going to be happy about it?


Rin says: Do not look back Katie.

Sophy says: RUN KATIE RUN :((


Rin says: Okay, what.

HOW OLD IS THIS PLACE?

Sophy says: Crikey. It’s been two kids, a divorce and a car-crash since this place last checked in with the royal family.


Rin says: I’M JUST REALLY UPSET WITH PANDA/EMILY NOW. REALLYUPSET. I DON’T THINK I CAN MOVE PAST THIS.

Sophy says: BAHAHAHAHAH YOU’LL NEVER BE ABLE TO ENJOY THE SHOW WHEN THEY’RE IN THE SAME FRAME AGAIN.


Sophy says: Katie bursting out of the shop distracts Mr Gloves and he is a note-perfect slasher flick cliche when he says “You made me miss. I’ve never… missed… before.”

Freds comes to the rescue and is all ‘That’s it, that’s enough, let her go.” I can’t help thinking how this whole confronting the scary guy who’s messing with the little lady thing doesn’t work out so well for him second time around. And to think, Foster wasn’t even toting a gun. :(

Rin says: LOOK AT HOW SMALL KATIE IS. OH KATIE. Her little face!

Sophy says: Seriously, she’s barely making it into the frame there. Too cute.

The woodsmen call out a foreboding “Beware the moon!” and Effy, perhaps not quite at her witty best right now says “Whatever, freak,” as she gets into the car.

Rin says: She should have howled.


Sophy says: They’re barely on their way when they start to realize they’re being tailed.

Rin says: I told you not to trust a man who wears gloves. Also, I love it when the moon can be seen during the day. I used to think it was because they were friends and the moon would wake up early sometimes just so he could hang out with the sun for a bit.

Until yesterday when I learned of science. 8-)


Rin says: When I first watched this, I thought Panda was going to have a panic attack or something with the way she was breathing. I know the most logical animal-comparison for Panda would be a panda, but I think the best comparison would be a fainting goat.

Sophy says: Whenever someone mentions goats from now on all I can ever think of is this:

Fffff ♥



Rin says: One of the few times I feel…sorry for JJ? But then again he was questioning Naomi so, yes, GTFO JJ.

Sophy says: And seriously, why is he crying??? As if Sophia would be interested in him. Maybe if he’d slept with the right lesbian…


Rin says: Wankers.

Sophy says: Seriously, this is not okay. If Effy wasn’t freakishly collected about it all, they could have run these kids off the road. Funny manslaughter is still manslaughter you guys.

Rin says: omg =)) I WANT THAT ON A TSHIRT. “Funny manslaughter is still manslaughter you guys.” =))


Rin says: I tried :((((((((((( I really tried :((((((((((

Sophy says: It’s okay, Rin. It’s in your nature. Frankly, I’m surprised you held out as long as you did.


Sophy says: HAHAHAHA HOLYSHIT. Freds was telling everyone to chill out there for a while, but he seems to have succumbed to hysteria himself.

Rin says: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOJAOJOEIJAPHEXDIFNGAESPDNFAWS.


Rin says: Emily doll face.

Sophy says: The car slows in front of them, and they wait…


Sophy says: The woodsmen chuck a cigarette butt out the window and move on. Their jerk-face work here is done.

Rin says: Littering bastards.


Rin says: Wow, so this is the real reason she hung around during that scene in 303. Trust only Effy to be dumb enough to try it out on Naomi while Emily is right there.

Sophy says: At least Mandeh had the decency to wait till Emily had left the room. Sheesh.


Sophy says: Freddie mimicks the woodsmen dramatically. “Beware the mooon!” he says to Panda (Pandora Moon, please note), and it’s such a lame joke that it’s not even a joke at all really, and yet…




Sophy says: And yet Effy throws her head back and laughs, like it’s the most adorably failcakes thing she’s ever heard and she just can’t help herself. Freddie catches her eye in the rearview mirror, and the shot is absolutely hilarious and terrible and hilarious and wonderful and flashback-inducing and terrible.

Katie catches sight of the eye-catching in the rearview mirror and protests that it’s not fucking funny. And that’s when Freddie snaps out of it, says “Alright, babes, chill out,” leans over into the front seat and kisses her.

Rin says: I wish that shot of Freddie in the mirror was the most ridiculous thing I’ve seen, but it’s not. :-.


Sophy says: The moment is broken. Effy’s mirth drags itself down her face and she is silent and sad and alone inside herself once more.

Freddie allows himself a quick glance at her from the backseat. She keeps her eyes on the road.


Page 2

25 Responses

  1. M
    M at · Reply

    yes! you nailed it! i *always* think of cassie when effy says “wow.” lovely: )

  2. M
    M at · Reply

    i love her “Shiva-like superiority” — smug omniscient effy for all time.

  3. M
    M at · Reply

    LMAO! “you coming, juicy?” best keffy line of all time forever always :D

  4. M
    M at · Reply

    emma woodhouse and elinor dashwood after she hears lucy’s story. good call, sophy.

  5. spacedog
    spacedog at · Reply

    The ‘Jump In’ macro made my life. :)

  6. M
    M at · Reply

    hahahaha “NOBODY SCARES MY HEART. AND ANYWAY, WHY WOULD I WANT THAT?” so amazing, why so amazing, rin? sorry about the multiple comments, btw, i usually leave one per page but this page is pretty epic for me. i love effy: )

  7. Aya
    Aya at · Reply

    I’m impressed that zombie!Rin was able to reach into the car *over Naomily* to get rid of Panda’s braid *without getting distracted.* That is just a remarkable amount of self-restraint for anyone… if it were me, I don’t think I could’ve managed.

    Somehow I’m a bit surprised Foster didn’t make it into the creepy jeep. I was very excited for this Recap, though and am glad it is here. I flailed a bit for the Naomily Bike Scene flashback/Effy Taunting macro… it was a good time. Brilliant thus far, and off to page two!

  8. E
    E at · Reply

    Oh, I just noticed that Naomi and Emily are both waring v-neck sweaters over button-down shirts in the car scene!

    …and so is Freddie, sort of. Hm.

  9. Rubben
    Rubben at · Reply

    Wow…This has to be one of your best in my opinion. Espesh the “my number” macro hahaha.

  10. KITTKO
    KITTKO at · Reply

    FFFFFUU YOU’VE OVERDONE YOURSELF AGAIN!

    EFFY/TEGAN
    EFFY/TEGAN
    EFFY/TEGAN

    YESSSSSSSS, IT WAS JUST A MATTER OF TIME

  11. bla
    bla at · Reply

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH I saw ‘my number’ in Effy’s phone and I KNEW this was coming :P Epic.

  12. xBenji65
    xBenji65 at · Reply

    I never realized before that the Freddie was saying the joke to Pandora because her last name’s moon. I just thought he was imitating them. Thanks for making me get it. ha. But I don’t think they were laughing because it was a funny joke, I think they were just laughing out of relief of the insane situation.

  13. polymorph80
    polymorph80 at · Reply

    I loved the Jump In bit right up until you got the words wrong – it’s “you cannot go too far”, not “you can never get very far”, and it’s petty and it’s a nitpick and I hate myself for it but gah, that song kept me sane and I need it done right. :-p

    Also, that garage is way behind the times. I can’t remember the last time I saw a petrol station selling leaded (it’s been banned in the UK since 2000 and is now only sold by a vanishingly small number of garages for use in historic cars that can’t be converted).

    Also also, the gun/Freddie point just reminded me of the “POINT POINT POINT DEAD” bit from the 301 cap. :-D

    Also also also, Texas Chainsaw Massacre is an interesting reference – from what I can tell, most people seem to regard 308 and 407 as classic horror stories…

  14. diggablu
    diggablu at · Reply

    Ok, so to start with you guys need to know I knocked back two exceptionally good offers on things to do and people to spaz with tonight. Somehow I decided that sitting alone in front of a laptop, cackling at your creativity, was a much better way to spend my evening.
    I thought “Boy Wonder” was Robin?? Which reminds me of the fact that when Nanna makes oldies jokes that I get ( like the one about the other hot Naomi – Watts that is) it makes me feel old too.
    I dunno where you got that pic but it is seriously ( I might sound sarcastic but I’m trying hard not to be) the best looking goat I’ve ever seen.
    I also love blonde clouds…overcaste days like that are what I live for.
    Effys “facial” scene was encompassed by me L.M.F.A.O!

    P.s – hey Ophy got to know what youn fmoat is now…if it’s Braindead then you really are my fairygawdmother.
    It was Peter Jacksons finest moment.

  15. Angie
    Angie at · Reply

    BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ…

  16. anat
    anat at · Reply

    Oh MY that pic of Panda after Rin’s special care is horrific!! and so LMAO worthy!!

  17. shley
    shley at · Reply

    was that kristen bell with a goat?!

    so cute. i die.

  18. Federica
    Federica at · Reply

    OMFG totally laughed for Muppets love and Karookie (L).
    And also thanks for the “Beware of the moon” joke.I’ve never noticed he was talking to Pandora.
    And ffs,Freddie’s faces are fucking hilarious omg.

  19. tapette
    tapette at · Reply

    That Lois Henrickson/Cook comparison blew my mind.
    The plot with the dudes at the gas station struck me as the British version of Deliverance; very random, very creepy.

  20. UtterlyPuzzlified
    UtterlyPuzzlified at · Reply

    I finish reading this at three in the morning, when I had to go to work at 9 am
    I had never had so much coffee in my entire life…
    this is what rophy does does to you
    This is great :)
    I actually now noticed how great of an episode this is, so thank you
    I laughed the entire time even when I didn’t get some of the references lol

  21. bridget
    bridget at · Reply

    When I first watched this episode, I genuinely thought something was going to happen to Katie when the guy cornered her in the shop.

    You see how small she is and then you see this guy blocking the doorway and all I could think of was how much self-confident, fighting Katie Fitch looked like a little girl just then. And that just made the whole moment even worse for me… because you know there would have been fuck-all any of them could have done to save her when the other hicks were outside with rifles. Although I think Emily superFitch might have at least taken one of the guys out.

    I’ve experienced for myself guys “joking around” about stuff like this… and it makes me wonder if men actually appreciate the impact that rape/the prospect of rape has on women in general. Let’s just say the guys I encountered are lucky I didn’t kick them where the sun don’t shine. I don’t play football, but I could bend it like Beckham if the situation calls for it.
    …Sorry for getting completely off-topic. lol

    Oh, and… Why does Pandora look like she’s about to sneeze in every other pic? lol

  22. Emma
    Emma at · Reply

    Closer examination of the dirty silhouette reveals a ‘surf n’ turf’ in the middle there. Probably not Tony’s. :o

    1. bridget
      bridget at · Reply

      She’s still upset that JJ won’t be her friend…

      so she created her own version of the wall-of-weird. While JJ’s is a magnificent clusterfuck of brain matter, Effy’s is more restrained and focused. lol She has to keep the demons in check, after all. Sex is just easier… All other thoughts lead to feeling. (Just ask JJ.)

  23. ohwowlovely
    ohwowlovely at · Reply

    I need to say, I LOVE your macros!! Hilarious! All of them. I don’t even know why I’m only saying it now. You have a great imagination!! (Katie running horrified at being shipped with JJ, omg!)

    And it just hit me, yes Keffy would be hot, but they would actually be perfect, cos they wouldn’t be afraid to call each other out on the bullshit. Omg, I need Keffy to happen!! Now!

    I’ve also only recently realised how awesome Katie really is too, she’s a bit of a hero for me now.

    And Effy in a complete mess is still like a hundred times better than I ever look, even at my “best”. Damn you Kaya!

  24. ohwowlovely
    ohwowlovely at · Reply

    Oh, and if Freddie had to point at the man with the gun, he could have at least pointed with bread! Get the finger out Freddie!

    On a serious note, I love so much when a soundtrack is an important part of a tv show or movie, just makes it so much better. *hugs Skins music department team*

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