Rophy says: HEED OUR WARNING! This recap is a little bit different than all the previous ones, because it holds such a special place in our hearts and we wanted to give it the attention it deserves. We encourage you to take breaks because we don’t want to be responsible for anyone getting DVT. Make a cup of tea every now and again, or tell your mum about how you want to marry those crazy Rophys and move to Europe. This is not a drill people. It’s the real thing.
Sophy says: Okay so these credits shots are always good, but that second cap of Naomi? Possibly my favourite Skins credits shot ever. It’s stunningly coloured and stunningly composed, with the slope of Naomi’s back and arm, the street winding down on the other side, the little blue house in the background and the tree making a line between Naomi and The World. And Naomi’s biting her finger, looking out with trepidation, thinking how maybe she’d be better off just reading her book some more because everything beautiful out there is just going to break her heart…
I also like her bra strap
Rin says: I don’t feel like I can properly express all my feelings about Naomi’s credit shots. So I’ll save you from my ramblings and leave you with this:
Sophy says: HAHAHAHAH OH LORD. FFF.
Nice brief-cut undies Rin. BRIEF CUT BRIEF CUT BRIEF CUT.
Sophy says: Naomi is always watching you. Always. And Sophia is always watching her. How poetic.
Rin says: I feel like I need a minute to recover from what just happened. /blushes
Sophy says: OH LILY. I love, love, love that her sleeping face is real – she’s not afraid to look a bit awkward and silly and, you know, like she’s actually asleep instead of closing her eyes for the camera. Win.
Rin says: I WOULD NOT KICK THAT OUT OF BED. In fact, this is what I would do:
Leave her wonderful charcoal drawings of herself sleeping. Just to let her know that I care.
Sophy says: Wow. Well I guess you did admit on live radio that you owned a pair of jean shorts… I should have known.
Sophy says: Ewww! Thank God he didn’t have shoes on. Rin would be in the fetal position by now.
Rin says: Why they hell would he be sleeping with shoes on in the bed? That’s not a thing!
Rin says: Jesus Christ… JESUS CHRIST!!!!!! I love the way she says ‘Jesus Christ’ I would not kick the way she says ‘Jesus Christ’ out of bed… in fact….
Sophy says: HAHAHA. YES. I ALSO LOVE THE WAY SHE SAYS IT. Particularly the ‘Christ’ part. So cute.
Sophy says: I love the way she doesn’t just look angry, she looks really, really bewildered too. I can imagine her putting on a James Fitch voice and saying “WHY WHY WHY”.
Rin says: I love the way she looks naked.
Sophy wrote the above for me, but I’m going to leave it…because it’s true.
Rin says: Wow, I really feel like I made a difference because I signed one of those
Sophy says: I don’t think I will ever recover from Naomi’s face when she tells Emily they should be reaping the rewards soon. Amazing.
And Bryan Elsley and Jack Thorne? Those trophies are WELL-DESERVED.
Rin says: It is SO upsetting that he is looking directly at her crotch. So so so upsetting.
Sophy says: OMG when the guy said Mrs Naomi was a nice woman, even if she doesn’t believe he’s the actual messiah, I SNORTED. Because I immediately thought of the last poll, and how really, not nearly enough of you voted Jesus/You. CAN’T YOU JUST BELIEVE THAT ROPHY IS THE ACTUAL MESSIAH??? FOR THE LOVE OF ROPHY CAN’T YOU????
But yeah *cough*. Pretty much everything about this is upsetting. Except for the part where Naomi is naked
But even then…
Rin says: OMFG. I’m actually smothering myself with my jumper sleeve, making really high-pitched squeaky laugh noises. HER FACE IN THE LAST FRAME LOOKS SO MUCH LIKE BELLA, I CAN’T EVEN.
Sophy says: Can I also just take a moment to say that when Naomi said “I’m naked. I sleep naked,” my mind immediately leapt to “I don’t wear pyjamas,” and I think we all know where Naomi got this bed-in-the-buff idea from.
Rin says: Aw, look at her shaggy bed hair. And Skins continues their fascination with bananas.
Rin says: We’ve been there! Together. I also live in there, in the pointy bit.
Sophy says: THAT’S WHERE WE SAW YOUR FAMILY OMG. The whole pack.
Rin says: Oh Gina. Thank god you redeem yourself later, because this whole ‘it’s just a man sleeping in your bed darling, get over it’ act is not boding well with me. NOT AT ALL.
Sophy says: IT’S SOPHIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHE’S THE ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rin says: I better warn you all now. I predict that half the recap is just going to be us going on and on about how Naomi has the best expressions. Ever. And like, the best face. Ever.
Sophy says: I’m trying to refrain… but I think the fact that there’s a cap every time she blinks says it all.
I love the way Naomi bursts in with “There’s a man. In my room. In my bed.” Like that is just the most horrifying prospect ever ♥
Rin says: Do you think the banana was strategically placed in line with the naked man?
Sophy says: I wouldn’t put it past Skins.
Rin says: I love how she wipes her mouth so ferociously. Mmmm ferocious Naomi. Also, who else for the first time ever realised that there’s ANOTHER man behind Naomi?
Sophy says: She’s like ‘What patriarchal banana? Oh that patriarchal banana. I’LL EAT THAT PATRIARCHAL BANANA SEE IF I DON’T.’ I wonder what that means…
Rin says: LOL at Sigmund/Emily teaming up together. And if Effy can’t even get that question right, then I hardly think she deserves the gayest title.
Sophy says: GIVE HER A BREAK, THIS WAS EARLY IN HER JOURNEY. SHE DIDN’T EVEN KNOW NAOMI WAS HER NEMESIS/SECRET CRUSH BACK THEN.
Rin says: THE NERVE this unnamed lady has. Honestly, she’s lucky the braids is the only thing I encouraged Gina to chop off.
Sophy says: Ew. Now I’m just imagining her with a penis, then not with a penis, but not in a never-had-a-penis-she’s-female way and… ew.
Anyway I gotta say… Rin… as much as your shearing tendencies sometimes distress me (gawww, just thinking about what you’re going to do to lovely, lovely Kaya in 310 D:) I have to agree that there really was no room for mercy here. This bitch was attempting the ultimate s4 Naom-braid, in Naomi’s own house.
Sophy says: Naomi gets to college, still somewhat disgruntled, but soft! There’s Emily Fitch, just waiting for her to make her Naomtrance.
Wtf is that extra trying to steal Naomi’s blondeness crown. She’s like ‘Ohhh I’ll use twice the peroxide and twice the hair’. Nice try, bitch, Emily only has eyes for one little beacon of light.
Rin says: Um, but what about that fucking GIANT next to that blonde? WTF?! DOES HE KNOW MANDEH?!
Rin says: I’m so in love right now. SO. IN. LOVE. I can’t get over Emily having to go all Moses on their asses because she couldn’t see where Naomi was for a split second.
Sophy says: We always praise Sophia for her dedication, but Emily is pretty damn dedicated too. And without the jean shorts!
Rin says: Permanent scowl is permanent.
Sophy says: Naomi is such a grumpy little thing ♥
Rin says: Oh Emily, you’re so adorable.. waiting for your #1 to turn up to college. I’ve read about how people think Emily is like a stalker, and sure I may not be the best person to talk about the subject considering my own enthusiasms, but I never once saw it when I was watching. What I saw was Emily Fitch, completely aware of herself and her feelings for Naomi and knowing that there was something between them. And not in the way where it is all one-sided, as we’ve seen in the previous episodes, Naomi was revealing herself to Emily. Piece by piece. Unfortunately it’ll be a whole ‘nother year till she gets the full puzzle.
Sophy says: LOL OMG. You just know the Skins writers got together when planning s4 and Lamie was all ‘Emily is such a stalker. Everybody in The Fandom thinks so.’ and Elsley was all ‘lol okay whatevs. They want a stalker, I’ll give them a stalker. Prop department?! Prepare the shrine.’
Rin says: Do you think she picked that handbag because the strap reminds her of Naomi’s braids? I think I need to get one.
Sophy says: I am certain that she did. And Rin, seriously, I was on board with the 763 caps for this ep, but did one of them really have to be of that guy.
Rin says: I DON’T EVEN SEE A GUY IN THAT CAP. I SEE NAOMI’S SHOULDER TRYING TO HIDE BEHIND AN IRRELEVANT OBJECT.
Rin says: I love this transition sfm.
Sophy says: You escaped this time, Naomi. This time.
Sophy says: The whole time Rin was capping she was saying to me “Sophy, we really can’t blame Kieran for kissing Naomi. I mean. Come on.” and I have to say I concur.
WHO IN THE WORLD COULD RESIST THAT? TELL ME WHOOOO???
Rin says: I know right? He’s only human, and Naomi just kept LOOKING at him. If she ever gave you that much attention, you’d be trying to kiss her too. Some might try with no attention.
Sophy says: Mandeh would have made herself into a teeshirt and plastered herself to Naomi’s breasts by now. For realsies.
Sophy says: Kieran and Naomi is really interesting in the context of Naomi’s absent father. You can tell that she really enjoys getting attention from him, and maybe that’s about a longing for a male role model, for a father figure who’ll think she’s clever and lovely and more special than everyone else in the world class. Naomi wants a dad, and I think that’s why she’s so horrified when Kieran gets the wrong end of the stick and kisses her. As she was clearly taught last week, incest is illegal.
Rin says: Yep, I definitely agree. I don’t really have any expertise on the subject, but if LOST has taught me anything, it’s that teachers who believe in you, support you and tell you you’re smart, are perfectly good father figures. And on occasion, might actually be your father in another reality.
Sophy says: Because of the position of the pole behind her hair in that first cap it looks like Naomi is popping out of the frame and into my world. But nooo. No Naomis in sight
Rin says: You got me all excited for nothing. HMMPH/Nose in air
Rin says: LITTERING! 5 points from
Gryffindor Form BD1.
Sophy says: Um… yeah… okay. Huffle… mugs?
Sophy says: I actually sort of like this overall dress thing. It looks sort of sexy half undone like that.
Rin says:n Oh right. Yeah. I put that screencap in so you can see her overall dress thing. That’s right. Heh..heh……..heh.
Sophy says: OH HAI THOMAS WHO’S SUDDENLY A STUDENT AT THIS COLLEGE.
Rin says: And sadly, this is not the most ridiculous thing that will happen during the course of his education.
Rin says: Rofl, Panda’s dorky wave to Thomas. Although why aren’t they sitting together? Or maybe they realise that they’re going to have all of university to do that so there’s no rush.
Sophy says: Idk what’s going on with Effy’s outfit here. Did she come as a pirate?
Rin says: If she’s never going to fully commit to the race, then I just don’t see what hope she has, nor why she keeps trying.
Sophy says: Ffffff Effy. So fucking wishy washy. I know Freds dresses like a girl, but that is no excuse to stare longingly at him, okay?
Rin says: Yes Effy, Freddie does still hold a grudge against you for sleeping with his best friend after he told you he loved you. Or are you trying to plead that he only said that he told you without actually telling you, and just expected you to know. Now you know, you know it now and so.
Sophy says: You… hate the tender-hearted torch song…
Ironically? The song actually really, really fits. Because Freddie is what Effy loves and what Effy loves she has to hate. It’s all backwards. And maybe that’s why everything goes to shit when it feels like they’ve only just gotten started. Because Effy did it all the wrong way around, and it hurts, looking back at all of this, because it all feels like so much wasted precious time for these kids.
Oh Emo-Freds. With your loneliness and your pining and your simmering resentment and your quiet, internal WHY WHY WHY???
Rin says: I rofl at how Effy doesn’t even look at Panda to tell her to shutup before she has a chance to speak.
Sophy says: lol, running theme. Effy telling Panda to shut up when she tries to do the whole Truth, boom thing about her feelings for Freddie. Can I just say that I love that Naomi notices? Oh Neffy. Needed moar.
IN A PLATONIC WAY, BACK IN YOUR BOX, MISS STONEM.
Annnnd of course, Effy deflects as hard as she can by turning around to look at Cook…
Rin says: HAHAHA She’s such a reluctant leader at that.
Sophy says: NAOMI YOU ARE SUCH A BRILL GIRLFRIEND. LEADING A BUNCH OF BLONDES WHO COLOUR COORDINATE THEIR SHOES TO THEIR NON-EXISTENT BRAINS OR SOMETHING.
Rin says: Just because you successfully ditched her at the entrance, you don’t really think you could have avoided her in a form meeting, do you??
Sophy says: I love the way Emily is just unruffled. Because a) Emily Fitch is just cool as a cucumber. And b) maybe she didn’t realize Naomi was purposely avoiding her earlier, maybe she hasn’t put it all together yet. At this point, I think the implication is that in Emily’s mind… they’re dating. Or sort of dating. They’re starting to be something and it’s been wonderful and they’ve both been so much happier…
Rin says: Naomi looks a little bit scared…a little bit guilty. Not at all annoyed. Keep trying to push her away Naomi, we’ll see how that works out for you
Sophy says: Oh Naomi. Time to stop being happy, huh?
Rin says: JESUS, WHEN ALL THE KIDS START SCREAMING. What the fuck, you’re in college, not kindergarten. THE BOY IN THE 2ND CAP, JFC, GET A GRIP. Katie Fitch is just looking like a fierce motherfucker. And a bit slutty.
Sophy says: LMAO I know right. Oh noes, a power outage, we’re all going to die!
And that outfit on Katie Fitch, I just… no. It’s more sluts and studs than her sluts and studs outfit.
Rin says: Well yeah, it’s gross. BUT SHE STILL LOOKS FIERCE?
Sophy says: Katie Fucking Fitch is always fierce. Even with bows in her hair.
Rin says: Oh Douglas. And fff that projection effect is really cool.
Sophy says: Eh, IDK this didn’t work for me. Doug got a little too cute in gen 2 and I just found him grating in the end.
Rin says: Harriet, let the poor guy have his fun. You show Doug more discipline than you do the students ffs.
Rin says: “Lets put it to a vote!” Ahhh I don’t know about you, but Naomi and Emily already seem like a couple.
Sophy says: They are! They have been. I mean, we saw them kiss at the pyjama party, kiss and roll thank you very much, and then we saw them out, alone, together, at the quiz night, their very own adorably lame and faux-social first date… they have absolutely been becoming a couple over the last two episodes. Only now Naomi’s faltering – Naomi’s thinking how everything is a mess at home and how she’s scared that if she lets this happen, if she takes a deep breath and does nothing and lets them fall effortlessly into a love she knows will be life-altering… it could wind up getting a whole lot messier.
So she’s shutting it down. Or she’s trying to, anyway.
Sophy says: Freddie take notes. You’ve got the floppy hair down, but if you’re still interested in being the gayest you’re going to have to get some pink polish happening on your nails - and a blonde wench to buff them.
Rin says: And a killer pout. V. Important.
Rin says: THEY’RE JUST SO GORGEOUS NEXT TO EACH OTHER. IT WAS INEVITABLE THAT THEY WERE GOING TO TURKEY-BASTE. Inevitable.
Sophy says: D: They haven’t turkey-basted yet, geez. Give them time!
And I love, love, love how Emily is already on this and busy suggesting to Naomi that she run. Nothing if not efficient.
Sophy says: FFFF BANANA SYMBOLISM. Gen 1 had apples, gen 2 has bananas. Gen 1 had Osama: The Musical, gen 2 had fart jokes. Just sayin’.
Rin says: I don’t know if it’s the prop dudes with an unhealthy obsession, or if bananas are just really cheap, but fuck they’re everywhere in Skins.
Rin says: It’s a NAOMILYTRANCE.
Sophy says: OMG YOU’RE SO RIGHT. THEY’RE TRANCING TOGETHER. IT’S HAPPENING
Rin says: “I never want to shut my mouth-ism” “Great. You’re making me sound great.” OH THE BANTER. Emily is relishing the chance to have a pretty normal conversation with Naomi.
Sophy says: I love the way Kat delivers that omg.
Rin says: “We’ve had about 3 conversations our entire lives.” Not that you’re counting or anything, ey?
Sophy says: haha! I love the way she delivers the line after that: “So the idea that you know I’m always talking about anything is a bit ridiculous.” Perfection. I would love to see Lily do some straight comedy. I mean straight up comedy rather than dramedy. She can still be gay. No really. FEEL FREE TO MAKE HER GAY WHEN YOU HIRE HER RICKY GERVAIS AND STEPHEN MERCHANT.
And also, I love Naomi’s exaggeration there. Only 3 conversations, really? I can’t count those from what I’ve seen on the show, and I doubt you both took a vow of silence for the duration of the pub quiz.
Rin says: I find this so fucking adorable. SO ADORABLE. And ridiculous, christ. They just stare and stare, even though they’re not exactly having a delightful conversation.
Sophy says: They’re like those nauseatingly cute couples who can’t get off the phone. Except they can’t get off each other’s boobs.
Rin says: Aw Emily, you’ll bond with Cook later, you’ll see!
Sophy says: THEY ALL COME TO THE COOKIE MONSTER IN THE END???
Rin says: I love the greasy she turns around to give him.
Sophy says: A greasy? Wtf is a greasy. You and your hip, street lingo.
Rin says: Oh you. Ye with your ol’n time good willed English, ye avast rum rum rum.
Rin says: NOOKIE! One of my favourite relationships on the show. Sure it all seems like Naomi only has disgust for Cook, but later she’ll get to see a side of Cook that hardly anyone does. I guess we’ll save that discussion for the when the time comes and get back to, NO COOK. Please stop being so crass and telling Naomi she needs to see more cock. She’s seen enough.
Sophy says: Seriously cock is everywhere at Naomi’s place. She doesn’t need to see any more.
And can I just take a moment to say that the way Jack delivers the ‘You should see more cock’ line actually makes bile rise in my throat. Which is brilliant. And unpleasant. Brilliantly unpleasant.
Rin says: It’s like Cook doesn’t even see her haircut? Or the fact that she was undressing Emily with her eyes 2 minutes ago.
Sophy says: haha, oh I think he does. But he likes a challenge.
On a serious note though… I learned a lot from the subtleties of Jack’s acting whilst rewatching this ep for the recap. And I’m going to come out and say that I think Cook was a lot more into Naomi at this point than most people believe. He’s playing with her, right? He wants to get into her pants and have a laugh while he’s at it? Okay, but I see more than that. There are these little flickers of seriousness between punchlines and honestly, it makes sense given the way their dynamic has been subtly built up from the get-go… I think he really likes her. And oh Cook, I suppose it’s progress then, when you end up falling for the girl who’s in love with someone else. At least she’s not, you know, gay.
Rin says: I love his suspenders in this ep, they’re so cute. And I like that he keeps playing with them, nice touch Jack.
Sophy says: I hate the suspenders, as in I would look down on any boy I saw wearing them in real life, but I like the way Jack uses them, particularly in the next scene…
Rin says: Crispin. Like Madonna. GTFO.
Sophy says: Yeah he was a bit much. I mean, I’ll take the surrealism to a point, but… yeah, not sure I was on the Crispin-train.
Rin says: Doug has a rubber band ball. I love him.
Sophy says: PERHAPS WE’D LIKE TO BOUNCE IT
Rin says: SUSPENDER LOVE AGAIN!
And I finally decided to google Oggy! Oggy! Oggy! as my only other reference point for it was The Office.
Sophy says: THIS IS THE BEST SUSPENDER USE. I love the way he’s just standing there all bewildered and child-like and ‘Why can’t I rule the world?!’ And he’s just holding those suspenders out as punctuation. Win.
Rin says: Another cap for the…overalls.
Sophy says: Yes, overalls.
Rin says: First of all, Emily looks so proudly and adoringly at her box of fannies that I might start to ship it. And secondly, HAHAHAHA EFFY. Just. Quit before it becomes really embarrassing.
Sophy says: I think she’s having some kind of amnesia in this episode. Because she’s really gone downhill with her gayness – it’s like she’s learning everything for the first time!
IT HAPPENED BUT IT DIDN’T HAPPEN!!1
Also, just FYI, when Emily says ‘Why it’s my box Naomi Campbell’ I hear harp music swelling in the background.
Rin says: When Emily’s on screen you always hear harp music swelling in the background.
Rin says: Red denim skirt overalls should not look so attractive, they just really shouldn’t.
Sophy says: I used to have some like that… when I was ten. I had to wear puffy sleeved shirts under them though
Rin says: Ffffff I just realised I have a picture of Sophy (IDK why) from her first day of school and SHE ACTUALLY LOOKS LIKE THAT PICTURE OF NAOMI THAT EMILY CARRESSES IN 402. I am not kidding. She’s wearing pink overalls with a white frilly shirt. JFC. I wish I could put it in here. I’m going to ask for her permission to maybe include a small version.
Rin says: “Girls! Stupid! You’re all so stupid!” Ohhhhh yeah? I’d like to see your AAA results, asshole!
Sophy says: HE’LL NEVER WEAR THE BRAINY POO PJs. NEVERRRRRR!!!!11
Rin says: One of my favourite Cook laughs. I just love how he turns away and just dislocates his jaw to almost silently laugh.
Sophy says: HAHHA. I love the way Jack makes ridiculousness… real? He and Lisa are both very talented in that area.
Sophy says: “Haw, haw, I can see ur knickers!” WHAT IS HE FIVE?????
And omg does she have boxer shorts on? Because that would be SO. GAY. Oh Naomi, when they caught on to the whole ‘brief cut makes you gay’ thing you just had to one-up them. Bless.
Rin says: I have not a single clue what kind of underwear that is, but I’ve determined they are really really gay. They do look like boxer shorts because there’s a looseness to them? Am I giving this too much thought?
Sophy says: Always ♥
Rin says: If Naomi’s a slave to anything, it’s to the way she feels about Emily!!!! Which she’ll try to put a stop to by fucking the dead girl D:
Sophy says: NECROPHILIA IS NOT THE SOLUTION, NAOMI.
Neither is dressing as a pirate… you know Effy will think you did it to match her.
Sophy says: Rofl, I love the way that Cook just laughs. It’s partly because, as we know, he thinks Naomi is damn funny, but it’s also because that’s just what he does. Cookie’s philosophy on awkward situations: When in doubt, laugh.
Rin says: Reminds me of some people I heard on the radio recently. All they did was laugh nervously /rollseyes.
Sophy says: Well that does kind of play into my whole theory in which Rophy are just like Cook, throwing a lols party and being as ridiculous as possible in the hopes of being adored. Not to mention the fact that if JJ were real, we’d probably beat him up too…
Rin says: She can’t catch a break, she was at the ready, waiting for Naomi to turn around, until BAM. Naomi drops the bomb that cement mixers and staplers will not make her feel alright. Not at all. What a sadly specific coincidence.
Sophy says: HAHAHAH I LOVE HOW DETERMINED SHE LOOKS, ROLLING ALONG ON THAT CEMENT MIXER, STAPLER IN HAND – DETERMINED AND CREEPILY IMMOBILE.
Rin says: Rude finger. *giggles* KIERAN, if you want to stop seeming creepy.. DO NOT WAIT for students after class and then offer them a lift in your shitbox.
Sophy says: YEAH AND… don’t kiss them?
Sophy says: OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD. The detail may kill me. Naomi has pulled some tights out of her bag and put them on, because Cook teased her when she fell over and now she feels insecure and embarrassed. Fffff. I’m extrapolating and concluding that Naomi knew the skirt was a bit short, but was trying to be daring and sexy to get the attention she pretends she doesn’t secretly love from Emily. But then she got… boy attention. Which dnw brb tights. OH NAOMI.
I’m convinced that this was intentional, and extrapolation aside, I adore these little moments where we see Naomi’s underlying insecurities, where we see that she’s not actually bigger and tougher and wrought from inpenetrable metal… she’s a kid like the rest of them, with all the same fears and all the same needs.
Okay no. Naomi does have some special needs.
EMILY FITCH NEEDS.
Rin says: Don’t we all. Don’t we all.
Rin says: Hint: Never get into a car that needs to be kicked open.
Sophy says: It’s alive!!!!!!!!
Rin says: Or one that has a questionable spring.
Sophy says: D:
Rin says: BRB dying at Naomi calling it an ‘automobile.’
Sophy says: Potential Rin stalkers? Take notes. She melts at the word ‘automobile.’
And honestly, I find it so adorable that he asks her to give him a lift on her bike and then they just walk side by side… if I repress what happens on page 3.
Sophy says: Okay, whilst I love the tights detail, the outfit worked a lot better without them. Too much, Naoms, too much. But at least you left the floral jacket at home.
Rin says: Oh sure, blame it on the tights. When we all know you’re just upset that you can no longer see her bare legs.