Sophy says: HER EYES WITH THE BLUE RIBBON IN HER HAIR, I JUST FFFFF.
Now I know a lot of people have said this speech is brilliant because it foreshadows Freddie’s death so perfectly but… no. Whilst I absolutely believe, looking back, that the writers had planned 405 from the start, I don’t believe for a second that they had Freddie’s death firmly in mind. If they did… they should have gotten it out of their minds, because it’s just thematic stupid-sauce and it cast a big old hunchbacked and pointless shadow over all the other storylines and the final moments of the gen.
Anyway, don’t me wrong, I love the speech as much as the next person, but I refuse to see it as a genuine or clever foreshaowing of the shit that goes down in 407. At this point in time, yes, Freddie is Hamlet-esque – he’s haunted by the subconscious judgment that his father killed his mother, tormented by what he sees as the disrespect of her memory in using her to get Karen into the Sexxbombs… he’s confused and emotionally overloaded and as a result he is hopelessly inert, unable to make his own mind up about what he wants rather than letting Cook, Effy, his family, even JJ kick him around a chessboard and being emo about it… but he grows up. He changes. By the time season four comes around, by the end of this episode to a large extent, he is no longer in limbo, unable to man up and make things happen and “so boring somebody has to kill him.”
So yeah, Naomi is clever and witty, and her teasing him in an attempt to nudge him into action is awesome. But it does not in any way validate the fuckery Jamie Brittain pulled in terms of Foster and his bat of gen-ruining doom.
Rin says: Yep, it’s “funny” but no way in hell was it ever planned. AND NAOMI, you make me want to go back to high school, fail english and then ask you to tutor me after school. And then you’d help me with my essays. ♥
Sophy says: I wish they’d had more Naomi/Effy, but I also wish they’d had more Naomi/Freddie. I think that’s one of the things that makes Freddie’s character less relateable for some, that nobody wrote any touching scenes for him with the nation’s favourite lesbian couple or well… any of the side characters. He was all about Cook and Effy really, and it kind of limited his scope.
Having said that, it’s possible that it was a conscious creative choice rather than an inadvertent failing. Freddie is somewhat withdrawn as a person. Funsponge is not the life of the party, and, as discussed on page 1, he’s not good at articulating his thoughts and feelings. And at the end of the day… he’s pretty much had too much on his plate with Cook, JJ and then Effy, since day one. NO NEW FRIENDS FOR YOU, FREDSTER.
Back on Naomi/Effy though, this is why I wish they’d been better friends. They both have this insight into each other’s hearts that is kind of startling and sweet. And I guess it’s beause they’re both afraid of their own feelings and feel vastly more comfortable reading other people’s. And I guess it’s also because they’re both terribly clever little people. If Naomi had gotten an episode in s4 I feel sure it would have included great scenes for them, which would have made Naomily’s reunion that much more layered. Unfortunately I don’t see how it could have done much for Effy’s storyline since she just kind of ceased to have one.
Rin says: I WISHED FOR MORE NAOMI/ANYONE. But yes, specifically more Naomi/Effy? I would have died. The moment they share in 307 is amazing, and I guess they tried to do the same in 407 but that was so ridiculously contrived that we can’t fully appreciate it.
Rin says: Naomi would like that, very much so.
Sophy says: BRAINY POO WILL BE THERE. WITH BRAINY BELLS ON.
Rin says: Shouldn’t Josie have said ‘panking’ or something?
Sophy says: ROFL, you’re off your game Josie. Tsk tsk.
Sophy says: “Solliloquizing”. Oh Naoms.
Did anyone else notice how much happier she is in this episode than she’s been in previous college scenes? She’s practically sparkling, all witty and brilliant with a smile on her face instead of a scowl, with a wink instead of an eyeroll, looking fondly on young love and urging them to seize the day… gee, I wonder why that could be?
Rin says: I LOVE HER LIKE FIERCE, YA KNOW? She’s like fucking leading the class at the moment…you could say she’s like a better person. Happier. Less alone. LESS FUCKING LONELY.
Sophy says: LOL the way Cook laughs at Naomi’s joke. Love.
Also, his throat looks like it’s made of marble. *peers*
Rin says: And now I can’t stop imagining buffering his neck.
Rin says: I’m gonna kill that damn extra! Weeeee!!!! I’m gonna kill that damn extra! Weeeee!!!!
Sophy says: I love how Emily is more amused than jealous. Because… TWELVE. COME ON.
Sophy says: Cook needs Mrs Panda to teach him some calming exercises, stat.
Rin says: It looks like they’re wearing the same pants, and Cooks shoes matches them both, and JJ’s shoes matches Cook’s jacket. Gay.
Sophy says: SHUT UP JJ, YOU WHINEY BITCH. Maybe you could try being supportive and caring and asking about what’s happening in Freddie’s life for a change instead of pouting about hanging out and being useless and letting Cook ruin things and then blaming Freddie for it and walking out when he apologizes for something that isn’t even his fault.
Rin says: Just look at his face. He’s a five year old going, ‘But Fredddiiieeeeeeeeeeee, play with meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.’
Sophy says: I gotta say, as almost universally repulsive as Cook is in this episode, and as much as I personally can’t stand people who do the kind of thing he’s doing to JJ now… I still giggle and rest my head in my hands when he asks passers-by to “have a tickle!”
idk, good actors are like clever politicians. They’ll make you swallow anything (even if you usually throw up later.)
Rin says: I LOVE THAT PART TOO. Hahahahah.
Sophy says: Freddie is pissed. He does not want to be here. But he still closes his eyes like a pro for the makeup team? Yeah. Nice work, Luca.
Rin says: The trophies in the background remind me of something. When I was young (around 6 years old?), I remember being at a school fete with my mum and looking at the stalls that sold random crap. I really wanted to buy this shiny gold trophy because I didn’t have any trophies. My mum laughed and said no, you can’t buy somebody else’s random bowling trophy.
I wanted to buy a trophy! How ridiculous is that? And a BOWLING trophy, nonetheless.
On second thought. That probably explains these:
Sophy says: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. ANYTHING. ANYTHING FOR THE TROPHIES. I have none. In fact I don’t think I even have, like, a badge or a ribbon. Or anything. *bounces ball*
Sophy says: I LOVE, LOVE LOVE the way he crosses his arms and the expression on his face as he says “I can’t quite put it into words”. Fffffff lolforever.
Rin says: He’s like an emoticon.
Sophy says: Bob Fossil says: “I may be a corporate puppet or… whatever. But I have a fuckin’ good time. How’s being an angsty little prick working out for you?” and I fucking cheer, because as much as I love Freddie, and as much as I think he gets treated like shit by everyone in this episode and is totally right to feel the way he does… IT DOESN’T MAKE THAT LINE ANY LESS TRUE AND HILARIOUS.
And Rin didn’t make enough Fossil caps because she hasn’t watched Boosh because she sucks so I’ll have to comment on another bit of Fossil gold here.
“I could eat you. I’d love to eat you.”
Rin says: That bit is so disturbing. And also one of my favourite parts of the episode????
Sophy says: Karen is way too enthusastic about the prospect of Fossil eating her.
lol oh the stripes on stripes on Freddie. It’s so bad. I love how his outfit is so thrown together, just like he’s been thrown into this whole thing.
Rin says: That suit. Yet it’s still better than what he tries to wear to the Love Ball omfg.
Sophy says: Aaand Freddie finds Effy’s breadcrumbs.
I love the way the warm light makes his shirt look a soft violet colour. JJ notwithstanding the second cap is really pretty too – the green of his teeshirt and the blue of his shirt with the green-blue of the foliage behind… the red rope hanging and the tiny flowers on the bush.
Rin says: Why is it that you studied law and not design? WHY?! OTHERWISE WE’D BE GOOD TOGETHER.
Sophy says: Freddie rarely wears shirts and JJ makes a lame, done to death, over the top observation that “Wow. I haven’t seen you dressed like that since… ever.” I roll my eyes. Freddie is not charmed either judging by his expression and the smoke of dragony rage exiting his nostrils.
Rin says: I DUNNO. SMOKE COMING OUT OF FACE AUTOMATICALLY EQUALS:
Sophy says: lol Freddie, I know his nickname is GayJay, but please… don’t try to be the gayest with him. It’s so much hotter when you do it with Cook.
ngl though, this scene was sort of cute. It’s a rare glimpse of an actual friendship between these two that goes beyond Freddie rescuing him from fun.
But then JJ says Cook wants Freddie to come to the quiz night and things get dark…
“Cook doesn’t have any friends. Just… people he knows.”
“Don’t say that!”
I liked this. Freddie is struggling with how to break free of Cook’s demanding and dominant nature and become his own person, and maybe he’s going a little too far to try and rip through the bond – even if he says it, he knows it’s not entirely true that Cook doesn’t have any friends – because as he says at the end of this series, “You’ve got me.” For better or worse, Cook is his friend. He just needs to find a way to balance that with being a friend to himself.
JJ, on the other hand, is still a child. Freddie’s words scare him, because he doesn’t want things to change between the three of them, no matter what the cost.
It’s sort of sweet and I almost care about him right now.
Don’t worry, it will pass.
Rin says: Don’t worry. I’d never let you forget where you came from.
Sophy says: Okay, okay, I guess it’s possible that this was purposeful foreshadowing of the bat debacle. Doesn’t mean I have to like it though.
Follow the breadcrumbs, Freds!
Or, you know, don’t. :-<
Rin says: Loving Effy gets you killed? BRB WARNING KATIE.
Sophy says: It doesn’t work on Keffy. Scrapey love is immortal?
Sophy says: This shot of Effy reminds me of something. I’m going nuts trying to put my finger on it. Help?
Rin says: I’m not entirely sure, but now you’re making me think that I recognise it from something and now I’m going nuts. YOU MADE ME GO MAD!!!!
Sophy says: LAMIE BRITTAIN SAID THAT’S WHAT LOVE IS SUPPOSED TO DO?????
Sophy says: Mr and Mrs S, unable to put their daughter first for a few minutes.
Rin says: I think they’re trying to kill each other with their eyes.
Sophy says: Effy gets up and leaves and neither of them really minds, because it’s not about her, it’s never about her, because they’re sad, selfish people who should never have been allowed to have kids.
(I’m glad they were though. Tony and Effy Stonem ftw.)
Also, can I just take a moment to say how amusing I find it that they’re all sitting there smoking at this family meeting? All three of them, as in including their 16 year old daughter? Does this really happen? Is this a thing that happens in Britain?
Effy opens the door…
Rin says: *reports to the parents television council*
Sophy says: It’s Freddie, and he’s trying so hard to be casual that I’m shaking my head and smiling to myself and looking away because it’s cute like a trainwreck.
“What’s up?” he asks, with an attempt at a cheeky smile, because this is a perfect mirror, he thinks, this is him showing up on her doorstep the way she showed up in his garden… but unfortunately for him, he doesn’t get quite as warm as a reception as he gave.
Effy doesn’t say a word, doesn’t crack a smile, walks inside and leaves him standing there. But she leaves the door open too, and so he follows.
Rin says: Welcome to Awkward City. Freddie should have packed a bag. (oh wait no, that kills you lol)
Sophy says: Lamie’s tip of the day: Always, always, always… travel light.
Sophy says: Effy and Freddie sit on the couch and the elder Stonems rage in the background. And I like this, I do. Because Freddie is inarticulate and Effy is not. But she chooses to pretend to be. There are some things she refuses to talk about, and what’s going on with her parents and the way she feels about it is most definitely one of those things.
So she shows Freddie instead. She lets him sit there and listen with her, she lets him watch her clutch a pillow to her stomach and wait for it to be over.
Rin says: I love how amongst the turmoil there is the brilliant line from Mr Stonem, ‘Don’t you dare use cunting and oxfam in the same sentence!!!’ and the way he steps into frame and points. JFC. Perfect Skins is perfect.
Sophy says: idk Rin, I wouldn’t say it was perfect…
Now it’s perfect.
Meanwhile, still in Rophyland…
Sophy says: For the love of god, Freddie, next time pay attention.
Rin says: Fuck off Effy. A skull ring wouldn’t increase your chances anyway.
Rin says: He’s so clueless and full of hope. Poor boy.
Sophy says: lol, oh Freddie. That was almost as bad as the little bit of word vomit that actually comes out of your mouth…
Sophy says: Freddie gives Effy back her breadcrumbs and promptly tells her they’d be good together. The timing is way off and oh please there is no way you’re going to make a girl melt with that Freddie, especially not Effy Ice Queen Stonem… but at least he’s saying something. At least he’s trying to take some kind of action.
Rin says: He’s like…blending into the background.
Sophy says: Effy flatly tells him no, they wouldn’t be good together, because she’d break his heart.
Freddie goes for levity and says, with a little smile, “Maybe I’ll break yours.” Oh Freddie, you huge, adorable, naive dork.
Sophy says: Here comes one of my favourite Effy lines.
“Nobody breaks my heart. And anyway, why would I want that?”
Freddie doesn’t have an answer for much, and he certainly doesn’t have one for that.
Rin says: LOVE this exchange. Especially considering the shit hitting the fan right about now.
Sophy says: Stonem parents drop by to make sure Effy and whatever friend is hanging around are fully aware of World War III. “Unbelievable,” Effy says, and I tend to agree.
Sophy says: Mr S says to Freddie “They’re not really crazy, you know, they’re just women,” and I pffffffffffffff because nice attempt at a mislead Skins. On its own that line is such a cliche, but in the context of 405 it’s kind of brilliant.
Rin says: I bet you in series 4, Mr Stonem got the call that his daughter was crazy and had tried to commit suicide etc. etc. and he just went, “She’s not really crazy. She’s just a woman! ”
Sophy says: Tony left. Her dad left. Effy watches Freddie walk away and maybe she feels lonely and maybe she feels safe – maybe the blinds are the bars of a prison cell and maybe its better that way.
Rin says: I see frying pan, I think fry poach scramble.
Sophy says: DO YOU ANY WAY YOU LIKE
Sophy says: Is it disturbing that I’m thinking how pretty the blood looks with the blue of his jeans and the graffitti?
Luke’s stunt double is pretty kickass.
Sophy says: I’ve seen it said that Freddie is something of a Sid character for the second generation, only prettier. I can see it, to some extent. At the very least that festy mess on his bedside table certainly makes me think he could be spending the night in Sid’s room.
Freds just close your eyes and go back to sleep. You don’t want to know what’s been going on out there.
Rin says: I fucking love his Albert Einstein pillow case. I want one. Someone make me one.
Sophy says: I like how they left the door Musketeers-adorned to retain the suspense.
Rin says: THAT DOOR will forever be etched into my mind as the backdrop for the true love speech. And like.. I see all the Vans stickers and and. Yeah. Vans.
Sophy says: Omg. That’s why they really left it untouched. IT’S PART OF A NEFARIOUS PLOT TO SELL VANS TO NAOMILY FANS.
Sophy says: HAHAHHAHAH RIN THAT SECOND CAP. JESUS. I’M ALMOST SO DISTRACTED BY THE HILARITY I DON’T HAVE IT IN ME TO RAGE ABOUT THIS FUCKERY MR F HAS BEEN INDULGING IN.
Rin says: The poor production crew get none of the credit for clearing out the shed! Daddy Mclair is a real bitch.
Sophy says: I said almost.
Jfc this was awful. Like… awful awful. AWFUL. So much so that it almost smacks of poor writing. Because… I mean… he even has the gall to accompany the deed with “It’s amazing what you can accomplish if you get up early enough, isn’t it?” wtf wtf. Honestly, from what we see of the dad in the rest of this ep and in 405 we’re not supposed to think of him as a cruel fucker, and this was just so very much the action of a cruel fucker. My heart breaks for Freddie here, because this wasn’t just a shithole shed, this was his haven, and those white walls? That’s where his memories used to be. I understand Mr F wanting to support Karen, I can even forgive him for indulging her at the expense of his son given the circumstances and to an extent, but this? This is just beyond awful.
Rin says: It’s pretty much getting rid of all your child’s fondest memories. FIRST THE PRODUCTION CREW AND NOW THIS.
Sophy says: I adore the way Freddie says “I think this is the worst thing anyone’s ever done to me,” like he’s so hurt, so appalled and feels so ignored and unloved that he’s not even him anymore. Once he’s over his initial expletive outburst, it’s almost as though he’s a bystander, documenting this fuckery for us in a clear and concise manner.
And LOLFOREVER, I may never recover from the hilarity of the second cap. The way he’s standing. And the grandpa slippers? I just. Wow.
Rin says: Does he have a curved spine or some shit?
Sophy says: Fffff! Once again, no Naomtrence. CURSE THIS EPISODE.
Although I suppose it’s better than 310 which just had NO NAOM AT ALL
Rin says: It’s like they didn’t even WANT to make this episode the best that it could be.
Sophy says: Ow, ow. He looks so sad and defeated and small. I look at his face and I know what this feels like – not understanding your parent and not being able to get them to understand you. Stalemate is lonely.
Rin says: Awww. I do feel for him, but then he’s wearing that hat and I’m just a whirlpool of mixed emotions.
Sophy says: So Emily and Naomi are at the quiz night alone together, despite the fact that, as it turns out when Effy comes in, one of the teams needs more members.
It’s totally like their first official date.
Rin says: Naomi took Emily to a quiz night to show off just how smart her pants were. Unfortunately she forgot to wear her pants. Emily didn’t mind.
Sophy says: And now that Naomi is around (rejoice, peasants!), Effy wants a word…
Sophy says: Problem solved! Not so much for Effy, but oh well.
Rin says: At this point I can’t even feel bad for Effy. Like… I’m handing her a switchblade as we speak.
Sophy says: Naomi is totally the dude, leaning back in her chair with attitude, while Emily leans forward in her grey cardigan with her little pink bow.
PS. Kat lied, pink looks awesome with her hair.
And I think the rinscope needs to do something about that second cap…
Rin says: I feel almost ashamed that you would underestimate me. This was one of the first things I made. ALSO, Naomi is wearing a pink headband too…MATCHING HEADBANDS, SAME BED.
Sophy says: OH RINSCOPE. single/creamy.
Sophy says: Naomi is bored with this shit. She’s thinking ‘Is it 306 yet? Why isn’t it 306 yet.’
Rin says: She’s not alone. WHY ISN’T IT 306 YET. *salivates*
Sophy says: Oh look, Effy brought a guy with a babyface and a really thick neck! Sorry Eff, I’m not sure he’s going to make Freddie jealous enough. Especially after you jump into the water and make out with him. Then you’ll really have to up the ante to fuck things up between you. Maybe you should do something really cruel and twisted like sleeping with his best friend again and making sure he knows it? Oh wait. Always one step ahead.
Btw I think someone bungled something in the editing room, because this…
… cannot be real. That’s what happens when Effy enters a room in her dreams.
Rin says: I think Naomi was on edge, thinking it was Katie coming to take Emily away from her for being so gay together. Noone told Naoms that Ben Schiffer didn’t know Emily had a twin.
Sophy says: Naomi asks who Effy’s friend is. Effy half turns to him, asks with expressionless and sniffly disdain “What is it?” The jock says “Mike”. Effy’s response? “Hmm.”
Rin says: I really like his purple V-neck.
Sophy says: Naomi makes her best “yikes” face and looks a little sad that her young lovers aren’t doing as well as she is right now.
Rin says: I was going to ask if Naomi is going to get lucky, and then I saw the slot machine in the background with Pots of Gold and my head kind of did a 360 spin in my skull.
Sophy says: I think Freddie should go on these rants more often. They’re educational.
Rin says: This is what happens when Naomi winks at you. You are instilled with an irrational need to defend her until the day you die. Oh……………….awkward.
Sophy says: I’m a big fan of smoky eyemakeup but come on… that just looks like there was a bushfire under her eyes.
Rin says: She’s been out all night getting fucked up! Gawd, you’re the worst Effy stan ever.
Sophy says: D: …
Sophy says: Freddie tries not to stare at Effy and her not-him, fails miserably… until JJ spills the beans about Cook and Karen.
And really, this is one of my issues with JJ – not so much as a person but as a character. He’s always used for things, stupid, cheap plot-advancing things, like randomly letting slip massive secrets for no good reason, and to me it just feels so fake and shoe-horned.
I mean, come on, him asking why Cook had sex with someone he finds “reprehensible” is basically the same thing as asking why he has sex at all.
Rin says: Shoe horns are one of man’s greatest inventions. Please refrain from including it in a sentence that is meant to abuse JJ.
Sophy says: So… you hate shoes… but you love shoehorns.
Rin says: HAHAHA I don’t hate shoes. LIES AND SLANDER.
Sophy says: Freds is not happy, and Rin has capped for us the most epic and fitting hand-in-the-Cookie-jar face as an accompaniment.
Rin says: “Cookie caught with his hand in the Cookie jar.”
Sophy says: For some reason reading that immediately made me think of him masturbating.
Oh well. I suppose it’s fair enough. He is the only one of the musketeers who hasn’t had a tug on screen.
Sophy says: ew, ew, ew.
Rin says: I think what happens next is more ew.
Rin says: HE LIES DOWN NEXT TO HIS OWN SPEW. THAT’S JUST LIKE. SHITTING AND THEN LYING DOWN NEXT TO IT. I JUST. I need to go lie down. And no, not next to any excretions.
Sophy says: Omg he’s wearing SHOES TOO. GET HIM.
Sophy says: Freddie has gotten pretty damn drunk, and after a quick vomit outside the pub, he looks up and sees an Effy I presume is all in his head, telling him to “just be”. I’m not quite sure what to make of this. It seems to me that what Freddie learns in this episode is how to try not to just “be”, how to not just skate around and be pushed and pulled this way and that by other people. What he learns is how to act. But then, maybe, when it comes down to it, that’s what true being is – being yourself or perhaps the version of yourself you want to be… it’s about taking control and letting go at the same time. Maybe that’s what dream!Effy is trying to tell him.
I sort of with she’d just told him not to eat those chips.
Rin says: Pfft, I want to eat those chips.
Sophy says: IT’S FLOOR-FOOD
Sophy says: lol I love that first cap sfm I want to make it a fansite.
And fff, the orange light at the window with the orange leaves amongst the green? Oh Skins.
Rin says: You can go ahead and make a fansite, as long as you don’t try and poach any visitors from here. Cause I mean, who do you think you are? Skins_bamfs?
Sophy says: I wish I was skins_bamfs.
Sophy says: Ew, sweat. I sweat like this when I dance. Sometimes I feel like they should make a PSA before the lights come up: Please be aware that the first three rows will get sprayed with liquid Sophy.
Rin says: And suddenly my desire to what one of your shows goes out the window. Or maybe I’ll just sit in the back with those fancy binoculars. I could totally do that.
But I don’t know, I found this part a little redeeming for Karen. I liked the fact that she is actually rehearsing, for what seems like a good while, and that she is willing to work for her rewards. I like the glimpses Skins, I do.
Sophy says: drunk!Freddie comes in with a golfclap for his sister, and idk, I’m not as convinced as I should be about his levels of inebriation. I think Luke needs to take some ‘I’m trashed’ acting lessons from Lily Loveless.
Rin says: NNNNGGGHHHHHH DRUNK NAOMIII. Sorry, what?
What sort of reaction to ‘golfclap’ did you want from me?