101 — Pilot

Rin says: Of course the first cap has to be Pipuh flashing her brilliant smile. And I swear, with all of those camera shots of the different cameras in the room, I was surprised that Sophia wasn’t sitting behind that desk. It seems like the sort of situation in which she would thrive. Like mould in damp places.

Sophy says: And I think we only need to look below to find out where the Mandeh-mould would thrive…


Sophy says: OH GOD. I am looking at Piper’s skin and thinking of mould and Mandeh and it’s all very upsetting.

THINK UN-MANDEH THOUGHTS! THINK UN-MANDEH THOUGHTS!

Rin says: WHY ARE YOU BRINGING MANDEH SO EARLY ON INTO THIS. Oh dear lord.

Sophy says:Idk, idk. I should be put down.

Anyway, meet Annie Walker everyone. She’s young and feisty and gorgeous and on her way to working for the CIA. She’s currently being asked probing questions about her love life by some jerk in a suit, – seriously, “The sex was good?”, what is that??? – and that’s why we’re getting this lovely flashback to Piper Perabo’s sunkissed nekkid back. I don’t know about you Rin, but I just saw that beautiful back, and I was like who’s that???

:)

Rin says: I know right, it’s soo-o-o-o-o beautiful!


Rin says: Pipuh tells us of this whirlwind romance with this guy she met in Sri Lanka and I’m thinking to myself, christ that’s so close to Goa. And then I’m wondering if I’m a little excited cause she’s ~close to Naomily or am I a little frightened cause there’s every chance that Mandeh also went to Goa in search of breasts? It’s all very confusing.

Sophy says: RIN. I was trying to repress.

And meanwhile, when you were desperately whittling the amount of caps down, how exactly did that last one make it through??? We saw him already. We don’t need to see him again.

Rin says: Roflllllll, I have no idea. Literally none. I think I found this whole personal question thing pretty outrageous/ridiculous, especially paired with THAT GUY’S FACE. So. Yeah. He gets to appear twice.




Rin says: 5 minutes in and they’re already giving us the Pipuh cry? Come on, that’s just unfair!

Sophy says: The pictures tell the tale… basically that swarthy asshole totally just abandoned Annie with nothing but a lousy note about how ~complicated the truth is. Although I’m actually not 100% convinced that’s why she’s so upset…

Rin says: OH MY GOD. I didn’t even expect that rollover caption and I just read it and I couldn’t even LAUGH because it was TOO FUNNY. I was just left with a gaping smile.

I just. COME ON GUYS. As if that cut-out of Mandeh isn’t just the most amazing thing. SO versatile.

Sophy says: The Mandeh cut-out is kind of like a shamwow. One day you’re watching an infomercial and scoffing at all those grand promises being bandied about… the next? Life changed.


Rin says: At the moment I’m writing this, we’re still recapping 308 and I just finished talking about the use of Dog Days Are Over for that episode, and then suddenly, OH HI WE USED THAT SONG TOO. And it still works. I was really excited, because this song does have that upbeat tempo to it which gives a bit of an adrenalin rush so it suits this whole jumping out of a plane thing, but thennnnnnn… what the fuck is that ugly stupid title? My heart literally dropped. The fastest way for a tv show to get me to like it is to have WELL DESIGNED titles. I think the idea of the first titles coming up whilst she’s in the air is BRILLIANT, but that font/design? I want to say it’s the ugliest, most dated design I’ve seen on tv in recent years.

Sophy says: Seriously…


Meanwhile Piper totally reminds me of Paulie there…

It might be that the goggles operate as a sort of headband. It might be that she’s about to leap from a great height.

It’s definitely not the parachute.

Rin says: PAULIE :(((((((

And did someone say goggles?

Sophy says: Sorry, Piper, you have officially been out-goggled. Go cry in a corner with Effy Stonem :)



Rin says: Thank god Piper pulled me out from my pit of despair. I was getting pretty locked on then.

Sophy says: The thing about this show is that no matter how lame it may or may not get, Piper will always be there with some bad-assery and/or cute facial expressions to win me back. Seriously, that was House’s big mistake – after the third season there just wasn’t enough Cameron to bamboozle me.

AND NO OLIVIA WILDE WILL NOT DO.

Rin says: Wait a minute. Don’t suggest that Cam’s awesomeness was all that House was about, because it was also when they still had writers for the show instead of monkeys with typewriters.

Sophy says: Oh no, no, no, I am not suggesting that House needed a distracta-Cam back in the glory days. Only that when the monkeys took over I might have kept watching if she’d still been around being lovely and adorable as ever.

Anyway, hello plot! Annie has been plucked out of training a month early and is going to be an agent, like, now! She’s a little perplexed by this, but she’s not about to look a gift horse in the mouth. And I really enjoyed using that expression and am going to casually toss it into the next conversation I have.

Rin says: BLAKE LIVELY’S BROTHER YOU GUYS. And of course he’s a complete sleaze who keeps looking down Piper’s shirt.

*Puts my palm to her palm*

Sophy says: LOL, whoever wrote this character’s introductory scene may as well have just saved themselves the trouble and had him walk up wearing a placard that said ‘I am the sleazy cliche’.

Having said that, he’s reminding me of Pete Campbell in that cap, which… awesome.



Rin says: I love how when they’re taking her photo for her ID it looks like a model photoshoot. Rofl. And also, the computer graphics kind of look plausible, I like that.

Omfg Sandy Cohen!! *waves* And by waves I mean, surf waves. Obviously.

Sophy says:

Rin says: Omfg look at him! He’s so happy!



Rin says: I thought this little piece of editing was rather nice. I always like a bit of parallel dialogue going on.

Sophy says: LOOK AT THE EYEBROWS. He’s still got it.


Rin says: Ah, Auggie! Here’s the very lovable tech nerd. And okay, he’s blind, which I find really interesting. But giving him a disability doesn’t make him interesting in itself, so I appreciate that we are seeing (oh dear) them trying to push past that. Making him into a very 3 dimensional character. Let’s just hope they don’t turn around and go, ‘AHA, HE WAS THE EVIL ONE ALL ALONG!’

Sophy says: No to the split-screen, just no.

On the one hand, Auggie being blind adds interest… on the other hand it’s a bit cute, isn’t it? They really need to make sure it’s a meaty plot-point somewhere along the way and not just quirky herbs and spices.

And meanwhile, I’m thinking of Cast-Offs and how it’s a shame that if they’re going to go the blind route, they couldn’t get an actual blind actor to play it. Not saying there’s anything wrong with people who can see playing people who can’t in principle… it’s just that there are so few good roles out there for disabled actors, so it’s always a shame when you see someone who has so many other options, being chosen for something so specific. Having said that, maybe there’s going to be some flashback action which will require Auggie to be able to see, in which case casting a blind actor would be problematic. Hmm.

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

And right now I just want to say IT’S HARRISON!!!!!!!!!!!11 ♥

Or… it’s Henry. 8-)



Rin says: The way they get along you’d think they’d known each other in a past life or something.

Sophy says: Rin… are you already shipping it? You are, aren’t you.


Rin says: Ah! Strong female boss. Of course.

Sophy says: Her outfit is so hot. The neckline ffff.

Rin frowns.

Sophy says: WHAT, IT’S JUST MY KIND OF OUTFIT??? JESUS.


Rin says: They tell Annie that they brought her in for her language skills (she knows 6!) and then casually add in, oh and we needed someone who looks like a hooker. Annie tries to be all professional and asks if she has to wear a ‘costume’ and I laugh at what she’s imagining that she has to wear…like..what? A big fur coat and fish net stockings? Idek. Boss lady tells her that what she’s wearing now is fine. Piper makes sadface.

Sophy says: Should’ve come prepared. But no matter…

Meanwhile, Piper, stop checking yourself out. There are people who can do that for you. TAKE A LOAD OFF :)


Rin says: We learn that Auggie lost his sight whilst in the field, when all Annie wanted to know was what’s up with the headphones? But I guess the awkwardness of him preempting the question takes away the awkwardness from her having to ask later.

Sophy says: I was a bit ‘eeehhhhh no.’ about this scene, because I feel like I’ve seen the comical crossed-wires reveal thing too many times. But still, they sold it nicely. And oh God. OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD. The Piper puppy-dog eyes have arrived.

brb melting.


Rin says: ‘Wish me goodluck’ — I was wondering how long it would take for me to get an IMAY flashback, and that was it.

Auggie says she doesn’t need luck, and Annie agrees by unbuttoning her shirt. She just needs her assets.

Sophy says: BOW CHICKA WOW WOWWWW!


Rin says: IT’S ALWAYS THE FOREIGN GUY PIPER. GOD YOU CLEARLY DON’T WATCH ENOUGH TELEVISION.

Sophy says: lol, and meanwhile he just looks so, so so Russian.


Rin says: What a beautiful hallway, made all the more lovely with a Perabo standing in the middle of it.

Sophy says: I’m sorry but that second cap is just so weird. It looks like her hair is front on but her face is angled. Like it belongs in ‘There’s Something About Naomi’.

Rin says: Now I’m just stuck, staring and staring.



Rin says: EW ROBE GUY. THAT IS NO WAY TO GREET A LADY.

Her smile in that fourth one. Oh sweet baby jesus.

Sophy says: Oh lord she is so cute. Anyway this is some Russian dude named Stas she’s supposed to be getting info from. Or is it?????!!! Anyway they set up their gadgety things to copy the intel over and then…


Rin says: That’s what you get for not fastening your robe. Shot dead. Or at least a broken hip.

Sophy says: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. He just doesn’t know how to handle his robe. I thought I was bad, but sheesh.


Rin says: Hehe look at her eyeing the blackberry. But then she just…runs in the opposite direction? Although it’s very slow mo and with bits of matter flying everywhere and it makes for quite a nice action-y scene.

Sophy says: The glass looks like snow!


Rin says: I DARE YOU TO LOVE ME!!!!!!!!

Sophy says: I was daring her to love me. You were just being creepy about Lily Loveless.



Rin says: I thought her ‘HE WAS BLINKING’ was kind of hilarious.

Sophy says: I like her. I like him. I like this business of them being a bickering married couple as well as co-worker spy types.


Rin says: She’s such a lost little puppy who just got scolded for peeing on the carpet.

Sophy says: Poor Annie, coming home with scraped knees instead of intel. Not a great first mission.


Rin says: Oh god, she’s totally channeling SOOKEH in that second frame.

And oh my god. Boss lady’s neck is like…whoa.

Sophy says: Oh my god, now that you’ve pointed that out it’s reminding me of something that used to give me nightmares as a child…

Seriously, I used to just stare at the spine of the book in the shelf and… quiver.


Rin says: Does the CIA have a wardrobe or are all agents expected to pack a change of clothes?

Sophy says: I don’t know, but she looks so preeetty there. Even if I’m not much of a fan of the Danny Zuko hairdo.


Rin says: The 3 piece suits are very Patrick Jayne. You never see enough people wearing 3 piece suits these days, I gotta say.

Game face.

Sophy says: I love the three-piece aspect. Not crazy about the colour combination going on though. And who the eff is Patrick Jayne?

Meanwhile the mission is basically to go back to the scene of the shoot-out and collect the blackberry. This time they’re going to lay the prozzie on extra thick.


Sophy says: I hope people never make fun of her mouth the way they make fun of Julia Roberts’. SCREW YOU, YOU MOUTHIST BASTARDS. Anyhoo, this dude is from the FBI, and Annie’s CIA business needs to be kept as secret from him as any other muggle.

Right now I’m just thinking… the CIA is cooler than the FBI. I’m thinking OUR GIRL IS COOLER THAN MULDER AND SCULLY.

Okay maybe not. But give her time.

Rin says: Mouthists. The real scum of the earth.



Rin says: I LOVE when she breaks character to tell him she sure as hell doesn’t like being called a hooker.

Sophy says: I liked that too. I liked how it was sort of, like you say, her breaking out of character, but also on another level a really clever way to be very much in character – if she was someone else posing as a hooker, she’d be glad to be called a hooker… am I making any sense?

Rin says: You only ever make sense. In a nonsensical way.


Rin says: Hm. At least they’re using Helvetica Neue for their graphics. Still. Stupid.

Sophy says: Mission accomplished! Pulled off with a nice bluff about desperately wanting to recover her pricey Louboutins… which is probably actually true. As far as I can see they don’t pay you much at the CIA so those shoes are seriously important. And I gotta say, the pink soles are delicious.


Rin says: PPLD!! PPLD!!!!!

Sophy says: PPLD 8-.

Everyone’s all YAYS LOLS WE HAVE INTEL WORTH DYING FOR. Except then it turns out it’s actually a load of crap they already knew. Poor Pipuh, she was so pleased with herself.


Sophy says: Look at her CUTE LITTLE FACE. I might be shipping her with Auggie too, just because she’s so cute it’s hard to see her standing next to another human being for more than a few seconds and NOT SHIP THEM TOGETHER.

Anyway, it’s all very sweet. Auggie offers her his arm and they head off to have a drink together.

Rin says: I hope when I enter the big scary workforce (for reals) I have an Auggie by my side. :(( Seriously. He’s probably the best workmate a person could hope for.


Ladies love a blind guy, they think we don’t care about looks.
THINK??
Little secret, you don’t actually have to see a woman to tell that she’s hot. You just listen to the way the other guys talk to her. Take yourself for instance.
*Cue Conrad* ANNIE WALKER. :smug: blahblahi’msosleazygivemeascone
I rest my case.
Thanks.

Rin says: You know I can’t not put a lip-smacking cap in. Come on now.

Sophy says: Where is Mrs Thomas when you need her????


Rin says: Boss lady confronts Mr Eyebrows, after following him to this restaurant having dinner with ANOTHER WOMAN!!! Of course he says it’s strictly business, which you have to believe because the other woman looks so offended.

Sophy says: I really love Hardcore Boss Lady’s hardcore pink lipstick. It works well with blondeness and black clothes.


Rin says: Annie realises that she’s lost track of time and hark! She has a dinner at home to get to. Auggie is like ‘UMMMM YOU’RE REALLY JUST GONNA LEAVE A BLIND GUY HERE?’

Sophy says: Bitch please, you’re a CIA agent. You can call a cab with your eyes closed. Um.


Rin says: A cab??? He’s AUGGIE, so you know. He can pretty much find a ride home from anyone. Cats would all line up, and make a cat-sleigh and friggen take him home on their backs.

Annie makes her way home and is soon aware of a car that is following her.

Sophy says: Are we about to get our Bourne on? I believe we are about to get our Bourne on.


Rin says: So her eyes are a little mid-blink in that first cap.. but the lighting and the colours were too good to not put in.

Sophy says: Wow, you really are a designer. Noticing the window dressing when Piper’s in the frame. Oh and by the way there was a massive high-speed chase sequence going on there too.


Rin says: Piper’s little shitbox is not exactly going to keep up with a sports car and when she crashes it a little, it pretty much gives out on her. She heads home instead…

And um, okay. You live in the prettiest house in all the lands?

Sophy says: Yeah, the sister’s lifestyle is pretty glamorous.


Rin says: I think this is Piper’s way of telling us that she works out. Acknowledged.

Oh hi cut-throat bitch. You were not part of the solution. You were in fact, part of the reckoning.

Sophy says: SOMEONE WANTS TO JOIN EVI AND KAT IN THE SUPERARMS GROUP.

And yeah, no, I’d rather not think of Pipuh’s TV sister as being from House.

I mean seriously, look what she did to the show…




Rin says: Oh god. That guy. I can’t even.

The only people who can pull off a moustache are Tom Selleck and two pretty lesbians who were dressing up as Mexicans and ARRRIIBAA!!

Sophy says: He is the most ridiculous thing I have ever seen.

(Two Tom Selleck references??? What is going on!)



Sophy says: Annnnnd it turns out his personality is ridiculous too. Anne Dudek? You are the worst matchmaker ever. Seriously, I’m starting to wonder if you were behind Huddy.

Rin says: What is it called…The Butterfly Effect? Amber = some stuff = Huddy.


Rin says: I think we need to start something new Sophy. PPLU. Cause, guh. AND OH MY GOD I KNOW WHAT ELSE WE CAN ADD TO IT.

This is a good day.

Sophy says: OH GOD OH GOD. Such pretty. And I love the composition of the Piper shot too, with the yellow lights behind her. Ffff.


Rin says: I guess they figured Piper already looked too much like a puppy for her to have a puppy as well. It’d be overkill.

Sophy says: I’m not usually a cat person, but between Pipuh and Hermione Granger, I feel my resolve to shun them in favour of dogs wavering.

Meanwhile, Annie is on a seriously good wicket here. Peter Gallagher did you negotiate this pool-house-esque deal for her??? IS THIS DANIELLE CHARACTER EVEN HER SISTER???


Sophy says: Annie skips out as quickly as she can, clearly not eager to set up another date with the Mustache.

Rin says: Remember when Pipuh was all upset about Lena getting all the good clothes in IMAY? Well.. I bet Pipuh thinks she’s struck gold in this show.

Or not.


Sophy says: Yeah, I can’t actually remember what was going on here. Sandy was having some kind of chat with a hot (and very, very familiar) chick he figured he could manipulate about something. He was wrong. She swanned off being all ‘Na na na na naaaaa na!’ and he was all ~impressed and it was all a bit revolting.

Rin says: Yeah there’s a leak in the agency and this is the reporter that’s been publishing all this stuff. ALWAYS ONE STEP AHEAD. So, Sandy wants to know who her source is, and well, she’s a reporter.


Sophy says: Meanwhile, Annie has been putting her language skills to good use and has decided that the pet-name the Russian spy called her might not actually be Russian – meaning he might not actually have been Russian, meaning that he might not have been who he said he was at all.

She goes to talk to her old college Professor and ding ding ding! We have a winner. Annie is right; it’s not Russian, it’s like, Estonian or something, and no Russian person would EVER EVER SAY IT OKAY? STAS IS NOT STAS OKAY?

Rin says: Never trust a Stas my mother always told me. Because a STAS IS NEVER A STAS.


Sophy says: Anyway, Professor Even-Smarter-Than-Smarty-Pants-Annie totally cottons onto the fact that she’s working for the CIA and that’s what this is about. He’s all ‘Annie don’t work for the CIA, it’s worse than eel sandwiches’ and Annie is all ‘I would never… *doe eyes*’

Rin says: She then drives into work and gets stopped immediately. With a little bit of overkill, mind you.


Rin says: Is there a reason that these types of photos are always in black and white? Like is it more cost efficient?

Sophy says: Ooh, someone’s watching…


Sophy says: And that someone is… the CIA. Mrs Toughshorts is not happy about this discussing-cases-with-civillians business.

Rin says: Annie bursts out with all these reasons why STAS CANNOT BE STAS and says she was also followed home in a high speed tactical pursuit. Boss lady lists all the people it could have been, even trying to convince Annie that it could have been the CIA.. to which Annie questions and Boss lady denies. Then she tells her to get off the grassy knoll and I’m like, ‘WHAT DOES A LAND FORMATION HAVE TO DO WITH CONSPIRACIES!!!’

Sophy says: She’s all UH, HELLO! Don’t the slackers usually prefer that grassy knoll over there? And I’m all Way harsh.




Sophy says: Annie is not happy. Seriously, she’s banging her head against the wall and stuff, and… err, Annie? I know you made a mistake and all, but I’m pretty sure what you’re doing right now isn’t going to make you any smarter.

Rin says: I LOVE THIS SCENE. PIPUH BREAK DOWNS FOR THE WIN ♥


Sophy says: Every time I see that poster on the wall, I just picture me and Rin, holding hands and swooping along above the eagle like a couple of Peter Pans. And Heather is underneath just blowing and blowing ♥

Lol, speaking of blowing, Piper’s hufflepuff mouth is funny.

Rin says: Hehehe she’s like a cartoon!

For adults.

Sophy says: Okay… what… has happened here. I’m upset.



Sophy says: Auggie comes in and is all ‘lol wut, I didn’t realize this was the ladies’ room. Or that you were in it.’ Annie is all ‘lol right okay.’

Rin says: Auggie must have put a tracker on her, seriously. HOW DOES HE KNOW WHERE SHE IS ALL THE TIME.

Sophy says: HE DOESN’T KNOW, RIN, BUT IT THROWS HIM.


Sophy says: He gives her a pep talk while she sits in the cubicle and there’s that whole inside-outside thing going on and I’m reminded inevitably of this:

I am also reminded of this, but I am often reminded of it by things like pencil cases and floor.

Rin says: Who doesn’t love a good public toilet talk? A lot of serious conversation always goes down in toilets. Especially when alcohol is involved.

Sophy says: Uh huh. Conversation.


People I thought were meant to be mentors turned out to be jerks. And vice versa.

Rin says: Am I falling more in love with Auggie? Yes. Yes I am.

Sophy says: By the look on Annie’s face she might be a little bit too.


So what’s the secret?
Well. I’m not sure there really is one secret, but I find it helps to keep a healthy sense of humour and a bottle of Patron in my desk drawer.

Rin says: Welling tears! I love welling tears.

Sophy says: Ohhh, aren’t they pretty? They are pretty.


Sophy says: Anyway, Annie decides she is suitably pepped, and she’s going to head to the FBI morgue to investigate further. She drags Auggie along with her to the morgue, because, idk, it’s more fun when she has someone to be cute with?

Rin says: idk, a blind guy seems like good cover.


Rin says: Right now she is challenging Emily for CHE awards. Cause, wow.

Sophy says: She gets a guy to take a photo of her and Auggie like they’re a googly eyed couple having a tour of the morgue or whatever, and it’s just so ridiculously cute, and yeah, Rin, I think she might need a couple of CHEs for these two caps. Emily has a generous spirit, and besides, she’s already had to rent storage space to accommodate her stash. I think we’re actually beginning to annoy her with them :(


Rin says: Listerine strips. Totally trying this next time I need to break into somewhere that has a fingerprint scanner.

Sophy says: Does this actually work? I want to know if this actually works. Oh well, it’s more plausible that when Michael was in this precise pickle on Roswell, and he just, like, grew a better finger.


Rin says: SCRUBS. PIPUH IN SCRUBS. It instantly reminded me of Lena in scrubs.

Sophy says: AT LAST THEY MATCH AS THEY ALWAYS SHOULD.


Sophy says: Why doesn’t he have shoes again? Is it just so his feet could hang all comical-dead-like off the edge of the guerny???

Rin says: Maybe he was brought up by proper asian parents.

Actually lolno. They would never allow bare feet to touch a surface that may not be clean. He should be wearing thongs. (THONGS ARE WHAT WE CALL FLIP-FLOPS IN AUSTRALIA, OKAY?! Calm down you giggling kids.)



Sophy says: Lol busted! And thank god – if they’d pulled this off without getting caught, the believability of this show would have been completely shot within the first episode.

Rin says: Cmon. Who could take a face like that into custody.


Sophy says: Anyway, the same agent who was at the scene interviews them, and Pipuh gets her Southern accent on again, insisting, to the last, that she’s just a call girl who wanted to get a bit kinky with a client.

Rin says: JUST RELEASE HER ALREADY.


Rin says: IT’S NOT AGAINST THE LAW TO BE THAT CUTE. IT’S JUST WHO SHE IS. [-(

Sophy says: SHE CAN’T TURN IT OFF. [-(


Sophy says: Lol, isn’t she cute, she’s unbuttoned her shirt! All the better to proposition the agent with, which, is a nice mercenary touch, but he isn’t buying it. He totally knows she’s with the CIA, and this is basically confirmed when he gets a message from upstairs telling him to release them both.

Rin says: Boss lady also had one of her employees delve into Sandy’s phone records to check if he’s been having an affair. Which you know, not exactly good use of company time but whatever. He’s not having an affair and she seems so disappointed.


Rin says: Annie is all ranting about how if STAS ISN’T STAS…WHERE’S STAS?

Oh Auggie, always smiling. I know someone who you’d get along with pretty well.

Sophy says: Oh you are so right. Plus you mentioned earlier he has that thing where he always seems to know where a certain beautiful blonde acquaintance is…



Rin says: And now that STASS is off the market, what can he get up to? MURDER OF COURSE. QUICK. Check the high profile people in the country at the moment.

Yeah, I’m totally CIA material.

Sophy says: You would be my favourite CIA agent EVER. I’d have posters all over my walls and you’d be forever tearing them down, because, you know, it’s supposed to be a secret and all.


Rin says: Ever since s4 of Skins, I’ve become kind of obsessed with thinking about shows and their budgets and how much they must spend on props/details etc. As in, this whole museum scene probably could have funded the 2 extra episodes needed for series 4.

Sophy says: Okay not sure what happened here but somehow they figured out that Stas is after a political figure named Petrov, who’s having a book launch in town.

Rin says: Yeah this part happened a little too quickly. If he..already has his book published, um, killing him won’t stop people reading it. It’d make them read it more?


Sophy says: So Annie skips down there and runs straight into…

SERIOUSLY???

Rin says: IT’S GROWN TWICE THE SIZE IN A DAY. FFFFFFFF.


Rin says: JUST GET OUT!!

She’s trying to find an ASSASSIN you insensitive moustache-clad jerk!

Sophy says: SHE DOESN’T LOVE YOU OKAY??? SHE DOESN’T LOVE YOU AND SHE NEVER WILL


Rin says: Of course it’s the old waiter assassin disguise. Gawd, they practically always have that disguise on special offer.

Sophy says: Always. Of course. And when they showed him concealing his gun under the napkin over his arm, I straight up giggled.


Rin says: She’s walking through the fire, cause where else can she turn?

Sophy says: I think this line’s mostly filler…


Rin says: Pretty spiral staircase is pretty.



Rin says: She follows him to an empty station. Really? It can’t be later than 8pm.

Sophy says: I’d like to live in this city. It seems there are few hooligans and there is much going to bed early.


Rin says: I love a good birds eye shot.

Sophy says: Bitch is totally going to kill Pipuh, but thankfully he does one of those drawn-out I intend to kill you shortly numbers, giving her time to plan her counter-attack…


Sophy says: … which seems to be spinning around really fast?

Rin says: Jaw clenching. I LOVE JAW CLENCHING.



Rin says: I can very much see Piper wanting to do all of her own stunts/fighting, even though she’s never really had such an action-packed role before. I can just see her excelling at it though.

Actually, I guess she knows how to fence.

Sophy says: The plan works insofar as she’s managed to get the gun out of the equation, but as kick-ass as Annie may be, this guy is still stronger than her.

And I HATE that about men. Here am I, struggling away at pilates for months to get my arms strong enough to open jars, and some fat jerk who hasn’t seen a gym in twenty years comes in and is all ‘lol I can has heavier weights please?’

Of course it might not be a men thing so much as an osteoporosis thing :-.


Sophy says: He has her firmly around the neck, choking her, but as she looks out across the quai, she sees a bleary figure holding a gun.

Rin says: I can’t help picturing that gun as a blow dryer? Which isn’t very useful unless you’re fighting a snowman.



Sophy says: He shoots Stas in the chest, with merciful precision, and hops onto the train that just happens to be leaving…


Sophy says: … but not before Annie can get a look at his face. And it’s totally her complicated boyfriend from Sri Lanka! :O

Rin says: :O:O SACREBLEU


Sophy says: Annie heads back to the office and Sandy Cohen is all ‘FIFTY POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR’ and I’m thinking whoa, awards already? At this rate she’ll be building houses for orphans out of them by the end of the series, the way Emily Fitch builds houses for orphans out of cute.

Speaking of cute, Piper is adorable when she’s pleased with herself.

Rin says: HOUSES FOR ORPHANS is like, totally what Naomily are going to do. Remember that Diva interview! LILY SAID SO.


Rin says: Auggie suggest they eat as many cheese cubes as they can before they take those away too. I LIKE THE WAY YOU THINK AUGSTER.

Sophy says: Do they make lobster cubes?


Sophy says: Hardass blondie and Sandy go out to get some air and drop the bomb on the viewers – Annie is not here because she’s a snowflake. They had ulterior motives when they plucked her out of training early, and those ulterior motives involve using her as bait to snag Mr Complicated. I like this. This is vastly more interesting than One girl in all the world. Excited to see where it goes.

PS. If you thought I was dissing Buffy above? You don’t know me. You don’t know me AT ALL. And if you don’t know me by now, Rophites, you will never ever ever know me. [-(

Rin says: Gawd, you’d think with all the things that we’ve been through. They should understand Sophy like I understand you.

Sophy says: They will never understand me like you do. The things you’ve seen, Rin… :-.


Rin says: Using the ice cream for her sore head = <333333

Sophy says: Ice cream. What can’t it do. Other than build hovercrafts out of sponges, but really, who among us has that kind of talent???

Anyway, Annie has a chat with Danielle who, it seems, has finally realized how fail she is at selecting suitors for her baby sister.



Rin says: Oh my god Pipuh. Your faces. I can’t. You’re such an adorable goof.

Anyway, I find this aspect of the show really interesting. The part where she is pretty much lying to everyone about her life and what she does. Can you imagine? Pipuh was saying in an interview about how when you’re a CIA Agent you’re allowed to tell anyone you want, just keeping in mind that the more people you tell, the more you’re putting them in danger. Like she spoke to a man who hadn’t told his wife/family of 20 years or something. That’s insane.

Sophy says: That is insane. I mean, many people live lies, whether they’re aware of it consciously or not… but they’re usually not this monumental and all-consuming. The stress of it would be unbelievable. And it will be really interesting to see how – if – Annie manages to maintain the bond she has with her sister over the course of the series.


Sophy says: Damn that hair suits Anne Dudek, both the colour and the style. And her makeup is great too. She looks fabulous in this show.

Certainly a step up from this…

Rin says: SHE GOT OFF THE COMPOUND :(( :(( :(( A true inspiration.


Rin says: Way too many throw pillows.

And I’m not going to lie. I searched her photos on display for a picture of her and Lena. NOT EVEN GOING TO LIE.

Sophy says: It’s only natural Rin. And it’s nothing to be ashamed of.


Rin says: ‘Forgive me.’ lol, unlikely.

Sophy says: Haha, idk. I’m guessing this guy is going to be the big epic love story for Annie – at least for a while. It’ll be interesting to see how they balance this shadowy, whirlwind romance plotline with the undeniable chemistry between Annie and Auggie as things progress.


Rin says: I don’t know how I feel about this whole whirlwind romance thing. The 3 weeks thing makes me feel pretty skeptical for the epicness of love they’re trying to portray. And then I see Pipuh dressed like that and I’m buying. I’M BUYING EVERYTHING SHE’S SELLING.

Sophy says: Well as long as they don’t try to portray it as more than it is I think it would work really well. I, for one, hope they don’t just dump it to make way for Annie/Auggie. That’s not to say I wouldn’t enjoy Annie/Auggie, but I don’t like easy emotional resolutions in my tv shows, and I especially don’t like them when they’re designed to pander to the fans. Of course I’m assuming the fans are going to rally behind Annie/Auggie, but come on. We all know they’re gonna – and I’m probably going to be in the throng, ngl.

Things like this make it hard for me to stay objective:

Meanwhile, Rin you’re a perve. I wrote ‘throng’ as ‘thong’ four times in the preceeding paragraph. I blame you.

And also I don’t approve of putting such bulky items in scrapbooks – they never close properly!

Rin says: You’re such a fucking scrapbook grandma.



Rin says: This guy is going to be one of those characters who we never hear speak for a while, and then when he finally does you’re left all confused, ‘WHAT?! Why do you sound like that?’

Sophy says: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. He’s totally the Maggie Simpson of Covert Affairs. I hope his first word is “Daddy”.


Sophy says: This is pretty. The song is pretty. The star-crossed lovers gazing at matching mementos thing is cheesy as all hell but whatever okay, it’s pretty.

So there we have it, the pilot of Covert Affairs, rophied. I was not blown away, but I’m not turning off either. Shows like this need a chance to build up to their full potential, and if the fans won’t give it to them, then we can’t complain when the networks don’t. And I love complaining. So let’s just say, I’d be coming back for more even if the Piper Perabo carrot wasn’t dangling in front of me.

And wow. That is such a weird image…


… isn’t it?

Rin says: ……

It may be weird, but why am I not surprised?

Also, CA just aired their 5th episode and I have to say, the show has been improving a lot. So if you did watch the first episode but didn’t think much of it, I implore you to reconsider. I think once it hits it’s stride, it could be a really great show.

Sophy says: I can’t believe it’s five episodes in. The Rophy-coach is too slow. We need jet-packs.


12 Responses

  1. Snicky
    Snicky at · Reply

    the one thing which is clear after this recap: since I got every little joke and cross over to other shows (Buffy, Skins, IMAY, …) I must be VERY VERY gay …
    I BET no heterosexual outsider can EVER read a Rophy recap without a gay-dictionary … haha …

    and by the way: recap was great ;-)

  2. anat
    anat at · Reply

    Ha great recap :D
    I actually have the first epi (DLed from Itunes for free yieepee) and have been intending to watch but.. Now i’m gonna go do exactly that!
    Auggie will always be Harrison for me *sigh* i loved him there and i bet i will love him here too. He’s grown so much thu, much more of a stud nowdays, but still has that childish face.. kinda like Piper.. they do fit well together i hope the show takes it there eventually :)

  3. heather anne hogan
    heather anne hogan at · Reply

    I love waking up to Rophy.

    Also, Kari Matchett (boss lady) looks so much like JK Rowling to me, which weirds me out a little bit because I kind of have the hots for her. I think it’s her neck and her ponytails and her bossiness.

  4. tapette
    tapette at · Reply

    Was that professor actually Lester Freamon from The Wire?

    This series would be better if it was blended with Fringe so that Piper could fall for Olivia Dunham, FBI.

  5. Walkingwithaghost
    Walkingwithaghost at · Reply

    First off I must say, you guys are the best. You never fail to make me laugh or smile.
    Second, thank you for recapping this show. I like this show, I think it has potential , plus what’s not to like about Piper ( she could be on a infomercial about pro-active and I’d be mesmerized ;-)

    I’m a bit surprised you guys haven’t said anything about “Rizzoli & Isles” I freaking love that show . as Dorothy Snarker says ” it TV’s first lesbian buddy cop show (it just doesn’t know it yet)” a recap by you guy or Heather would be amazing .

  6. Frankie
    Frankie at · Reply

    *sends jet-packs*
    You guys rock!!

  7. Miss Erin
    Miss Erin at · Reply

    Okay, so I downloaded this show, just so I could read your recap. Must say I am glad I did. You two never fail to disappoint! The show on the other hand? Meh.. it’s ok. I’ll stick with it, for a bit.

    Having said that, I am excited to see the return of Sandy Cohen and his killer eyebrows. I hope he brings the Nanna, bagels and Yogalates references with him. <3

    Also, am I the only one that thinks it’s completely gross that Annie puts the Listerine strip in her mouth after pressing it against the finger scanner??! Germs Annie, germs! If Auggie could see her doing that, I suspect he would be just as grossed out as I am.

  8. lapiscat
    lapiscat at · Reply

    but i don’t have a DVR – how can i watch skins on sbs and covert affairs on c.7 at the same time? :( (so what if i’ve watched skins a gazillion times… it’s real tv, dammit!)

  9. Em
    Em at · Reply

    Just watched this episode today and while it was enjoyable this Rophycap just makes it 10 times better. So thank you.

    One thing though…what with the Buffy references and all, how are you not referring to her mysterious Sri Lanka manfriend as Hyena-man? Am I the only one that recognised him from The Pack? Don’t tell me I’m alone in my geekness!

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