Kurt & Rachel – Bring Him Home
Rin says: Um. Lol.
They filmed it exactly like Defying Gravity.
Kurt is even wearing another ascot/scarf thingy!
It was too much, and now I feel like crying because I looked at caps from Defying Gravity and they are both so YOUNG and TINY and adorable and oh my goodness they’ve come so far. That’s kind of what stood out most to me during this performance, how far Rachel and Kurt have both come as individuals and as friends. As well as how they’ve matured as performers. It made me so incredibly happy to see them get a chance to do another epic duet together, and have it be a complete throwback while they’re at it.
I have yet to see Les Miserables because I’m a terrible human being and every night I cry about it. But I love that they picked this song and I don’t think they could have chosen something more appropriate for the two of them to destroy. I especially hope they keep making Lea sing all the songs from Les Mis just to rub it in the faces of all the nay-sayers who said she wouldn’t have done a good job as Eponine. LEA COULD HAVE PLAYED ALL THE PARTS. ALL OF THEM. SHE’D BE THE EDDIE MURPHY OF MUSICAL FILMS.
I have spent a good amount of time basking in the glory of this performance and how beautiful it was. Even the way Rachel sung was more Rachel Berry with her hands and her faces, and isn’t it funny how the moment she becomes a little more like her old self is the moment she starts really blowing us away?
And they both had watery eyes? And it made me have watery eyes? And Kurt was in a little man suit?! That one reaction shot of the girl head in handsing was basically how I was the entire time.
GUH. Our babies. Oh Hummelberry, may you never stop being in competition with one another.
Sophy says: What’s the most epic thing this show could do right after bringing the actual Rachel Berry back to us? How about a flashback-inducing parallel to season 1?
Really, we were already having palpitations over how damn Rachel Rachel was being and then this happened, and we were remembering Kurt and Rachel’s squishy little junior year faces belting out Defying Gravity before either of them had any idea they would become soulmates. I loved that the show brought up the fact that Kurt threw that note, loved how they had him gloss over the somewhat implausible reasons for it, and loved that they didn’t just have Rachel return the favour here. I was totally expecting them to balance things out that way and whilst it would have been very sweet it also would have been a touch corny. And a touch out of character for Rachel. Let’s face it, Rachel has always wanted to win, and whether people were being jerks to Kurt or not, finding out that she didn’t win properly all those years ago, would only make her more determined to do so now. Do I think Rachel would have thrown the high note now if she believed Kurt’s psychological well-being hinged on it? Sure. But anything less than that and she was going to fight him, to the end.
And you know, they were both perfect. Their little outfits, their little faces… the emotion in their voices. I couldn’t fault either of them so it was totally believable that the victory was Kurt’s but only by a hair. And you know what I kind of loved? Back in season 1 the two of them were singing a song written for a female. Now the two of them are singing a song written for a male. Symmetry.
I HAVE SEEN LES MIS. And it was good. And I cried and stuff. But I also agree that it would have been that much better if Lea Michele had Eddie Murphy’d its ass.
Santana – Girl On Fire
Rin says: As much as I loved the Hummelberry duet, it’s been Santana’s ‘Girl On Fire’ that I’ve been listening to on repeat (when I’m not listening to Heartthrob). Just…wow. Not only was I rendered speechless with how amazing she sounded, I was really impressed with the amount of conviction, angst and fierceness she sang with. This is by far a standout performance from Naya, and I am so glad she got the chance to do another song in this episode after Nutbush which I found underwhelming. This was right on par with Songbird in terms of emotional punch.
I know I’m not the only one and I’m sure Sophy will say the same, but Naya was looking especially beautiful this episode wasn’t she? I think it was during the Santana/Sam duet where all I could say was something along the lines of, ‘She’s really…pretty…’ and that was it. AND THEN THIS PERFORMANCE CAME ALONG AND JUST SWEPT ME OFF MY FEET. Obviously she’s always had an outstanding face and congratulations should be given daily, but there was just something especially gorgeous about it in this episode. The great mysteries of life.
I’ve always been a liker of Alicia Keys, but when I first heard this song I wasn’t that excited about it. Then Santana sung it AND SUDDENLY I’M ALL HEAD IN HANDSING AND OMG THIS SONG IS AMAZING AND BELLOWING IT OUT WAY OFF-KEY RIGHT ALONGSIDE HER. It really is an epic song and suits Naya’s voice so well. I love the ambiguity of it too, because we’re unsure if she’s singing about herself or singing about Brittany. I probably think it’s a little bit of both. Like at first it seems to be about Brittany and how she appears to have it all together and is happy etc. etc. but then it shifts to being about herself as she stuts off the stage, down the hall and out the door.
WHICH BY THE WAY. I FUCKING ADORED. It was such an awesome sequence, and maybe not the cleverest of metaphors but it was really well done with the slow-mo and leaving behind her past. And heading into the bright lights of her future.
LOL. Kill me
Honestly, it’s the best thing they could have done for Santana at this point, and I’m in love with the idea that this is basically her version of Roots Before Branches. I honestly can’t with how happy she looks once she arrives in New York, looks around and realises that she made it. I’m so happy for Santana because she’s gotten a lot of shit thrown at her, and no one can really blame her for having taken the safe option of college instead of moving to NY straight after high school. Now that she’s finally gotten some closure from Brittany she feels like she can let go.. at least a tiny bit, which enables her to follow her dreams and move to New York. With all of my heart I know that Brittana isn’t over and the scene they shared just proved that to me. It felt very bittersweet, but it’s the kind of scene that OTPs get. Really, I wouldn’t worry you guys. When they called each other their best friends, it was so clearly not meant in a ‘and that’s all we ever were and ever will be’ way. It also kind of reveals why Heather got it so wrong when she made those comments about Brittana.. she straight-up missed the point of that scene and took it as face value. But it really isn’t over between the two of them. Lol, later in the recap you’ll see me saying that I wouldn’t really talk about the Brittana of this episode, but apparently I can’t stick to my own word. I just wanted to make sure you guys knew that we know how some of you feel and that you’re angry. But I truly believe they weren’t trying to put an end to Brittana in any way. They’re just shifting them into something else.. and that’s pretty exciting. Change can be so good.
BACK TO NAYA’S AWARD WINNING FACE?
She’s moving in.
She’s fucking moving in.
Kurt/Rachel/Santana in New York! IN THE SAME APARTMENT!
We’re 3/4 of the way there.
Sophy says: Like Rin I was more consumed by the Hummelberry duet than this performance whilst watching the episode, but like Rin I found myself listening to this over and over rather than the Hummelberry track. So they really are both ‘Best song’ to us.
Naya always sings with passion, but I felt like this was one of her most arresting performances to date. I felt like she laid herself as bare here as she did with Songbird, only in a really different way. This episode sort of marked a point at which Santana decided to give up and just go be who she is and do what she does. She’s not going to try to hold on so hard to what she thinks she should do or what other people want for her – or to what she thought Brittany would always want from her. She’s kind of done, and there’s a sadness to that, but there’s also a freedom in it. I thought the transition from pain to pride to giddy joy was extremely well done, as Santana stepped out of the auditorium, then out of the school, then out of the subway in a whole new world. Like Rin said, it was so amazing to see her get her Rachel Berry moment, and it really showed how much the writers love her and her character – because she gets the big song moment to take her into the new chapter of her life. I only wish they loved Quinn this much grumble grumble.
But really, I am so excited for the Hummelberrytana dynamic, you guys. I was bouncing off the walls so much at the idea that she was going to be there with them that just the way she knocked on their door made me want to clap my hands. And it’s the perfect time for her to show up and move herself in, isn’t it? Because in the last episode Rachel became Rachel again, in this episode she and Kurt found their equilibrium again… it’s time for someone to come in and shake things up, and who is better at shaking things up than Santana Lopez?
I’ve already started imagining things like Kurt and Rachel huddled in the bathroom eating soup quietly and peeping out the door every few minutes to see if the coast is clear. And it never is. Santana is always lounged over their sofa buffing her nails and blowing on them, and eventually she raises an eyebrow and teases them because my god, they actually do go to the bathroom together.
I CAN’T WAIT.
I also have to agree with Rin that Naya looked particularly beautiful in this episode. I mean, she’s always gorgeous and all, but for some reason in this episode I was noticing it in every scene, to the point where I had to comment on it. Really every time she changed her outfit I was like, “WOW, NAYA LOOKS REALLY PRETTY.”
And yeah, Nutbush really didn’t work for me, because it’s just a god-awful song and the performance wasn’t camp enough to carry it. But I loved seeing Santana with her cheerleaders, since this was the last chance we were going to get. And I love that she bribed a girl to pose as her girlfriend. Oh Santana. You are such a compelling mixture of fierce and needy. I love it.
And Rizzoli and Isles. Lol.
Rin says: Oh my god. Yes, lol. Rissoles and AfterEllen.
Sophy says: They should have given a personal shout-out to Heather Anne Hogan. Next time.
Rin says: IS SHE LIKE, ACTUALLY BACK? There wasn’t a single part of this episode where I didn’t feel like our girl was missing. Even the parts where she was being especially lame and lapping up the adoration of those two dumb dumbs, I LOVED IT because it was pretty clear we were supposed to be laughing at her being pathetic. The way this episode opened was BEYOND my wildest dreams. And I love that they wasted no time in setting up the premise for the episode, and that like last episode it was Kurt who was going to be taking matters into his own hands to bring the real Rachel back. More on that later..
But for now can we just talk about how Rachel just being Rachel is the best thing in existence? And that it is everything. It was such a relief to once again be laughing at/with her instead of crying over the loss of Rachel Berry.
My absolute favourite part of the Rachel-bonanza this week was her reaction to Kurt saying he threw the Defying Gravity sing off.
“I don’t believe you, take that back.”
The way she said it so quickly and with so much hurt. AND WANTING KURT TO TAKE IT BACK. Like they were 5 years old and Kurt had just told her she wasn’t his best friend any more.
Also after Rachel had lost to Kurt and was down the hall looking like she’d just been told that somebody died? I was laughing and laughing and laughing. I love it when she’s a sore loser and wallowing in her own self-pity. It’s the literal best. LITERAL BEST.
Sophy says: OH RACHEL BERRY. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU MEAN TO ME?
Last week Rin and I hoped (with some trepidation) that the episode wasn’t just a one-off and that the real Rachel Berry was in fact back. And you guys, she is. She’s not quite as Rachel as she was in season 1, but then she wasn’t quite as Rachel as she was in season 1 in season 3 either. There was ample Rachel to go around, that’s what matters. I mean, her hair was all glossy and natural? And her eyes were 100% visible? And you guys she looked so pretty I could cry. BECAUSE LEA’S PRETTY PRETTY NAKED FACE. OH GOD.
And then her mannerisms were just noticeably Rachellier all the way through and the faces she was making and her general be-the-best ridiculousness? IT WAS BACK. She wasn’t hiding her light under a bushel of appropriate anymore and it was such a fucking relief to see that. There was only one point at which her Rachelness began to slip a little, and that was when she was walking down the hall with Brody. For a split second I thought Rachel was fading away and then I told myself No, it would just be that she wasn’t herself around Brody, and I could deal with that, but then even around Brody the Rachel couldn’t quite help coming out. Because those sad, sweet, guilty little kicked puppy faces she was making when people were picking on Kurt? Those were Rachel faces.
AND IT JUST. I JUST. PLEASE LET HER STAY FOREVER? I don’t even care if she keeps dating Brody. I don’t even care if she marries both Brody and Finn this season. I can even cope with the idea that we’ll only get a couple more episodes with Faberry in them this season. I can take Marley existing. I can shoulder all of these burdens as long as Rachel Berry is there to make me laugh and smile and just about want to cry with every glorious little thing that she does.
I swear, this Rachel? She probably could have made me head-in-hands my way through the turkey-fondling.
What’s that? I’m clearly delirious from the sudden overdose of Rachel? You might be right. But boy does it feel good. And I just want to mention that when the episode opened with Rachel opera-singing and Kurt making a crack about her being a second-rate Maria Callas? I nearly passed out. Because that was pretty much in a draft for a future ASWD chapter. Well okay I picked Joan Sutherland and Artie, but it was basically the same thing. And it was the best.
Oh and when I first looked through the caps I was really annoyed at Rin for failing to include Rachel/blanket/window, because Rachel/blanket/window is one of my all-time OTPs, but, well… see below.
A final thought: let’s all take a moment to bask in the fact that Rachel Berry is back because of Quinn Fabray. I mean, okay, sure, it was a team effort with Santana and Kurt. But I firmly believe Quinn’s presence and her please is what tipped the scales. She is definitely the straw on Rachel’s camel back is what I’m saying.
“And the biggest thing is that they’re brutally honest. And if I’m… going to be a diva, then… I have to be honest, too.”
Rin says: I had tears in my eyes during this scene. This is exactly what I hoped would come of the Tina/Blaine they were setting up in previous episodes.
When Tina started with her little speech, Sophy said to me that this is the first time that Jenna has been given a scene like this to do. And I realised all in that moment how robbed she has been in the past, but how thankful I was that they’re finally giving her a chance to do SOMETHING MEANINGFUL on Glee. I am so happy and proud and oh my god she was incredible. I think the beauty of the moment is that you always knew Blaine was going to be asleep for her confession, but that only made it more heartbreaking as she had finally gotten the courage to pour her heart out and it wasn’t going to be heard.
Sophy says: I am honestly stunned by how much I liked this. Look, I was on board with the Tina/Blaine ridiculousness in the episode before last, because I love Blaine and any time Tina gets to have actual screentime I basically want to take my pants off immediately because TINA COHEN-CHANG WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFE?
But I acknowledge that it was ridiculousness. And yet now I find that ridiculousness being played out as an actual meaningful storyline and I’m just kind of in awe of that fact. I actually think this has the potential, please note, the potential, to be one of the best things Glee has ever done. Because the way they’re going right now, Tina/Blaine is becoming something that it’s impossible. It’s a friendship, and it’s 100% friendship – with the nicknames and the chicken soup and the cheering each other on and the openness and the everyday. And yet at the same time it’s not easy. It’s not quite natural. Because it’s a romance that wants to be even though it can’t ever quite. And that’s an interesting thing to explore. It’s actually something I’ve wanted to see explored for a long time in a TV show I love, and for a long time I dreamed a dream that it would be Faberry. But you know, I have to admit that I would wind up feeling pretty dissatisfied if Faberry didn’t have sex at least once. So, there’s that.
And you know, Tina and Blaine aren’t gonna have sex and that’s painfully clear, right from the start, even if Tina’s still in a place where she’d like to pretend it isn’t. Because Blaine isn’t even remotely conflicted, that’s the truth. That’s what he says in this episode, and that’s what was made canon when he didn’t really go straight for Rachel after all. He is not going to go straight for Tina.
But he does appear to like her. A lot. And he actually seems to understand the way she likes him too, which I think is important. I was going to be so bored slash irritated slash offended on Tina’s behalf if this storyline had turned out to be a Tina-stalks-the-gay-boy thing. But it’s not. They talk openly about the fact that Blaine isn’t into girls that way, and though Tina makes a crack about being young and having time to find themselves, she’s not flat-out delusional or aggressive about her attraction to him and the ways it must be reciprocated or else. I was terrified for a second when he fell asleep and she straddled him. I thought, ‘Holy crap, here goes Glee assassinating Tina’s character completely in the name of not-funny LOLs’. Because I really thought they might be going to have her essentially roofie him with the cold and flu meds and then try to make out with him while he was sick and passed out. And that would have just been the most cruel and humiliating thing they could have done to Tina’s character. But they didn’t go there. At all. Yes Tina was kinda yearning for his boyish yet masculine flesh. But all she was doing about it was caring for him. All she was doing was rubbing Vicks into his chest, you guys, and it was the sweetest thing in the world.
And the funniest thing about Tina’s freakout over not being appreciated is that she was being appreciated. Blaine’s not an insensitive oaf. He would never not be grateful to a friend for doing the stuff Tina did for him. So it was kind of hilarious when she flounced on him while he was trying to express his gratitude. But the thing is that from Tina’s perspective… she needed more. And I get that. Think of it this way: it’s like if you give a present to someone you don’t really care about that much, and maybe they email you to say thank you, and you read it and you’re like ‘Oh that’s nice,’ but then you’ve already forgotten it ever happened because you clicked onto the Faberry tag tumblr tab you constantly have open to distract you. On the other hand, imagine you’re giving a gift to someone you’re really invested in. You know you’d be sitting there tapping your toes and wiggling your fingers, waiting for them to open it and getting yourself all keyed up for the look on their face. When they thanked you you’d want it to be good, right? You’d want it to be as special as the gift you gave? And that’s how Tina feels about Blaine.
She wants to mean more to him than friends mean to friends. She wants the way she feels about him to matter as much as it can, basically. And even if Blaine was too asleep to hear her little speech, he gets it in the end – he gets her. He knows what she wants from him and he wants to give it. And that’s why he asks her to be his date to the wedding – because she wants to be, because she’s fabulous, because why the hell not?
And this shit has the potential to get both gloriously adorable and gloriously messy. Seriously you guys I already want to write fanfic for them. In said fanfic they become closer than close, inseparable, all but dating and the butt of everybody’s sexless marriage jokes. They know and love just about everything about each other. They are as close as Blaine and Kurt were or Tina and Mike were, minus only the open-mouthed kisses and the naked touching. And then one of them gets a new love interest and the emotional shit hits the fan.
Seriously, how amazing would that be? Specifically I’m thinking of a scenario in which Tina/Blaine are married, basically, and prom comes around and Blaine is assuming they’re going together, and then some hot piece of ass notices Tina (gasp) and he asks her to go with him and she wants to because, you know, she might get to have everything with him – even the kissing and the naked stuff that is not at the end of the rainbow for these two, no matter how much they may wish it could be.
I can see Blaine being jealous and hating himself for it. I can see Tina crying and apologizing and smiling sadly at him while he wallflowers it and she dances with her jock. Because wouldn’t that just be the very most of painful? It’s hard enough when your friend gets a boyfriend or girlfriend and stops being all the things they were to you all of the time. It’d be even worse if you’d essentially turned that friendship into a relationship. Imagine having that rug pulled out from under you?
And okay, I may be getting a lot ahead of myself with this stuff. Maybe Glee is going to forget about Tina/Blaine altogether in a couple of episodes. Maybe Blaine appreciating Tina is supposed to be the end of their arc altogether. Maybe next week they’ll be chums and Tina will be calling Mike and that will be an end to it.
But I reserve the right to hope not, for now.
And you know, Jenna really did kill her big emotional scene. HER LITTLE FACE. AND THE TEARS. AND THE ADORABLE STRADDLING. AND JUST. It was such a first for her, and you know, it wasn’t the only Tina-first in this episode. I mean, first big emotional scene, first trophy, first voiceover, first lead in a spontaneous big group number with dancing and costume changes and and general flat-out Glee craziness.
It was just great to get to see her do so much. And Jenna being funny is something the show needs to run with more often. Because it works. SO DOES JENNA BEING SAD. Both are excellent.
Rin says: Yes yes yes! They have a huge opportunity to do something pretty spectacular with these two. Some of the most brilliant and unforgettable relationships on TV are the ones that don’t end well and are bittersweet. They resonate with us (especially us) because well, we’re suckers for a bit of heartache, but they’re also more interesting. And even though the whole mismatched sexualties thing isn’t particularly new, I do enjoy that they’re taking their time to properly explore whatever it is between Blaine and Tina. And I like how non-judgemental they’re being in regards to Tina’s feelings for Blaine. No one is laughing at her, or telling her she’s silly/stupid for falling for a gay guy. They’re portraying Tina’s feelings for Blaine as completely valid and I love Glee for it. Afterall just because someone is gay, it doesn’t automatically mean they become less attractive to the opposite sex.
It’s a really nice change of pace, and a departure from the usual OTP couples that Glee has stuck with for… years. I can definitely see something along the lines of what Sophy described happening between the two. And it’d be all kinds of glorious.
“You don’t need any of that. Your work speaks for itself.”
Rin says: When a scene opens with Rachel and a big soft blanket wrapped around her looking out the window you know it’s already going to make Best Scene. It probably wasn’t even cold, but she needed the blanket to complete the whole moping package.
What I really love about this scene though, is that these are the simple, meaty, heartfelt scenes of true friendship that I yearn for. I love the maturity they both show here, and this is definitely Kurt at his best. I think he’s happy that he beat Rachel, but that doesn’t mean he’s happy that Rachel’s hurting because of it. He did start off wanting to knock her down a few pegs, though there was no malice behind his motives. Sometimes we have to rely on our friends to keep us grounded, and Kurt went about it the only way he knew would get through to Rachel. He’s not going to go around gloating and telling Rachel that he’s better than her because he knows that’s not true. And more and more both of them are beginning to understand that they are both unique and special in their own ways — it doesn’t make either of them more talented than the either.
Plus Kurt went down to get Rachel an audition for FUNNY FACE because he not only knew that Rachel would regret it if she didn’t try out, but he also knows that she’s good enough for it.
Just so we’re clear, this knocking Rachel down a peg or two is only allowed when there’s a valid reason. The way she was acting, and has been acting in the past definitely warranted some action. THE RACHEL BACK IN SEASON 1 DIDN’T NEED ANY OF IT. That Rachel was a kitten.
Which brings me to… her face in this scene. Oh my god. All I can says is, welcome back Rachel Berry. Look at her tiny sulky face! Her eyes! YOU CAN SEE HER EYES! Her big beautiful brown eyes. It’s amazing how much more beautiful Rachel looks with nearly nothing on. Um, ON HER FACE. Nearly nothing on her face.
Quinn wishes Rachel always had nearly nothing on for her.
She looks so young and innocent and like the girl we all fell in love with all those years ago. The one who wanted everything too much.
And although this isn’t the first time Rachel’s heard this, Kurt tells her anyway. That that girl? The one with all the ambition? That’s what makes her special and she doesn’t need to let go of that. She just needs to forget about all the things she thinks she wants and focus on what she really wants. And guh, Hummelberry. You’re so wonderful and kind and loving. I could stare at those last 2 caps for an eternity
Sophy says: As mentioned above, Rachel/blanket/window OTP.
But you know, Hummelberry are pretty awesome too. You know something I love about Kurt? How easily and naturally he has matured over the course of the show. Perhaps it’s easier for him to grow up without downsizing his personality, because he’s never been as ridiculous a character as Rachel. Most of his over-the-top came from his outfits, but the reality is that a brief period of Finn-crazy aside, Kurt has always been pretty sane. I think that’s part of why he and Rachel work so well together – when Rachel is Rachel. Because they balance each other, you know? Rachel’s ridiculousness keeps Kurt from feeling too much like something out of the real world, and Kurt’s groundedness and good sense stops Rachel from just flat-out spinning out of control.
And god they are just so sweet sitting on that bed together having blanket-hugs. I love that Kurt didn’t crow about his victory because you know what? He really doesn’t need to. Kurt is something who is actually pretty secure in his own worth these days, and that showed in how quickly and easily he dispensed with the bullies-turned-sycophants. He doesn’t need that shit in his life and he wants Rachel to know that she doesn’t either. In some respects Rachel is this feminist icon who wears her ambition on her sleeve and won’t apologize for it. In other respects she’s kind of a mess of a lonely little girl who goes around craving approval from her peers. And I think what Kurt’s saying is that she’s better than that. I think what he’s saying is she needs to keep her eyes on the prize and the prize is not Brody, it is not fawning it losers, it is not winning silly little NYADA sing-offs. The prize is working on Broadway. That’s what she really wants and that’s what he really wants her to get.
I love that these two can get competitive with each other, but at the end of the day they have each other’s best interests at heart, always.
But the fact that Rachel flat-out sulked about not winning? Priceless.
The OG’s (Original Gleeks)
“Everyone thought that I was being a bitch when all I was doing was being brutally honest with people.”
Rin says: SUE/SANTANA? YES PLEASE. MOAR PLEASE. They have such a different dynamic than Quinn/Sue, because whilst both have a weird estranged mother/daughter vibe, the way Santana/Sue works is almost like two evil geniuses who sit around relishing their own greatness and talking about how much other people suck. I also like that they got another scene together as a follow-up because I like to imagine that Sue keeps tabs on Santana and Quinn.
I liked how this scene opened with Sue calling out the Glee Club ex-pats on how they must have teleporters because they’re always showing up. This is the kind of meta I like and enjoy Glee doing, because they’re poking fun at themselves by exposing these obvious logistic errors but also not really apologising for them because it’s also TV, so does it realllly matter?
AND AYAYYAAYYAYA!! Santana is no longer banished to pretending to be going to college somewhere that isn’t on Glee! AND I LAUGHED so hard at her reason of people thinking she was a bitch because she was being brutally honest with them. It took me right back to that time in Silly Love Songs when she was crying in the hallway with Brittany trying to tell her that it’s not her fault people suck. <333 It’s also pretty amazing how being ‘brutally honest’ ties in with what Tina was saying about divas.
“Look, please don’t tell my mom.”
“Oh, I can’t. I don’t speak Spanish.”
OH MY GOD.
Sophy says: OH SUE. Never stop being racist.
I love these two together and I think it’s like Rin said: there’s this understanding between them that in some ways they are the same. Like, maybe if Santana had never had Glee club and Brittany and all of these oddball friends who came to matter to her, she would have ended up a bitter, angry, tyrannical cheerleading coach or something.
But now she’s breaking free, you know? Now she’s off to create her own destiny. And I think a part of Sue would have been kind of proud of that deep down even if she did reject her offer to be the Finn to her Will.
ALSO. SHE OFFERED TO LET HER TRAIN TO TAKE OVER THE CHEERIOS AFTER SHE DIED. AND SANTANA WAS GOING TO POISON HER PROTEIN SHAKES. OH GOD NEVER CHANGE YOU TWO. NEVER. CHANGE.
Rophy Says No!
This guy still exists.
Rin says: Urghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I’m getting pretty sick and tired of seeing his face on my screen. STOP VIOLATING MY SCREEN. When will it end?????? What does he actually DO? Does he bring anything to the table?? NO. JUST GET OUT!
Okay, I know you guys probably expected a few other things to crop up in this category, like say…brittana/bram, finn/emma things. But you know what? We didn’t have any MAJOR quarrels with either of what happened, and both of them don’t feel in the least bit wrapped up. It kind of feels like the calm before the storm. So if the storm hits and we don’t like it?
All I can say is, batten down the hatches.
Here comes hurricane Rophy.
Sophy says: Ugh, just. Does he run everything at NYADA? I swear it’ll turn out he’s secretly in charge of that awful Glee club that British kid Kurt’s going to date runs.
On the subject of Bram, I must admit that I wanted to punch Sam in the face a couple of times in the lead-in to ‘Make No Mistake,’ but then I just kind of felt sorry for him because of the way Santana so clearly dominated his lame ass during the song. Sure Brittany wants to be with Sam, but nobody is ever going to convince me that’s how she would feel if Santana hadn’t been the one to let her go in the first place. And now Brittany knows that if Santana comes back to Lima and hangs around like a big useless Finn-lump it’ll only be because she’s jealous of seeing her with someone else – not because it’s what she really wants. So Brittany tells her to follow her dreams, to go be somewhere as big and as hot as she is. And when Santana objects to that plan it’s not because she’d rather be living in a two-bit town doing nothing with her life than be away from Brittany. It’s because she’s scared. So Brittany helps her to be less scared and sends her on her way, and it’s a lot like what Blaine did for Kurt and what Finn did for Rachel and Faberry and all in all it works for me.
The bit about them being best friends rubbed me the wrong way in the moment, but later I realized that that was purely because of the ways Heather Morris reduced their relationship to that. If I’d never read the quotes from Heather I’d be awwing all over the place at the idea that the two of them will continue mattering to each other as best friends no matter what happens with them romantically. And Santana did get to kiss her goodbye, and I’m glad of that.
I might be a little less confident than Rin is though about Brittana definitely not being over. The writers have been pushing Bram pretty hard and I suspect they’re testing the waters to see if they can win fandom over to it. They’ll probably give Santana a new love interest pretty soon and try to do the same there. And if enough people jump on those bandwagons they may very well never bring Brittany and Santana back to each other romantically. I’m not trying to be a downer here, I’m just telling people to be on their guard about this. I mean, when Juliet and Sawyer suddenly shacked up on LOST I would never have dreamed that they would be endgame, Sawyer/Kate be damned. And I don’t think that’s what the writers thought was going to happen either. They were testing the waters, just like they did with Jack/Juliet. And the thing is that a whole lot of people jumped on that bandwagon and then the writers felt confident to sweep everything Sawyer and Kate had meant to each other under the rug and just get on with things. And I’d hate for the Brittana fans to be betrayed that way, but I’d also hate for them to be lulled into a false sense of security about it.
We shall see.
On the Femma, I’ll just say that whilst Rin and I were screaming “No!” at each other and covering our eyes when the kiss happened, we didn’t feel comfortable actually making it a No. First, because we have no idea where the writers are going with it. And second because it was just so well acted. It would feel kind of mean to stomp all over it just because it squicked us out so much.
But seriously, did anyone else get the worst Terri/Finn flashbacks?
And did anyone else just wonder whether Terri will be in the wedding episode and hope against hope that she will be? Because.
But yeah, Brody’s continued presence on our show was our only real complaint about this episode. Though I’ll admit I did laugh my ass off as Marley being sexy in the opening number.
I should clarify that I also laughed my ass off at Blaine being sexy in the opening number. But in a good way.
Congratulations! We didn’t hate you?
“She never wins anything!”
Rin says: THIS WAS ACTUALLY THE BEST THING EVER. I sort of.. snorted with laughter because I wasn’t expecting it at all and it was literally the best thing anyone could have said at that moment. It was just so TRUTHFULLY MEAN but also not at all because the way Brittany said it with such enthusiasm and genuine happiness for Tina.
It was such a great moment that I was laughing my head off and telling Sophy that Brittany pretty much won me back with that line alone.
Sophy says: I think we have to face facts. Brittany just isn’t random the way she used to be. And that makes me very sad. However it is nice to be able to appreciate her in moments like this. BECAUSE HEATHER’S FACE WAS JUST. SHE WAS SO EXCITED, YOU GUYS. AND WOW.
So were we, Brittany. So were we.
Head In Hands
“The First Annual William McKinley High School Diva Award goes to…”
Rin says: ‘ABOUT TIME’ can’t be said enough.
I could be bitter and say this moment probably should have happened WAY BACK in season 2 or something, and that this is long overdue. But you know what? I’m just so darn happy and filled with joy that she finally got her moment, her sparkly confetti moment, that I can’t even take the time to nitpick. Tina killed this episode, like in the way that Brittany killed Britney. She just owned the characteristics of a diva and became this powerful force to be reckoned with. TINA COHEN-CHANG WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFE
Her outfits. Her hair. HER PINK LEOTARD THING.
I don’t even like Hung Up, in fact I kind of hate it. BUT I COULD STILL REALLY ENJOY THE PERFORMANCE FOR THE TINA OF IT ALL. And it was the first time she got given the chance to really show a different side of herself, a side that so many of the other girls on Glee have gotten to do numerous times in the past. She was a little bit sexy and filled to the brim with attitude, strength and confidence. The quick costume change behind the cardboard screens was THE BEST. And then when she ended the performance and suddenly had a towel in her hand and used THE WHOLE THING ON HER FACE, omg I died from the cute. She’s amazing.
Kitty was also amazing in that performance because she did the worm and was doing some break dancey stuff in the background. Who knew? And can we please have more? Thanks!
AND FINALLY. I always love a good trophy-giving because trophy’s are the best, but this has to be one of the best they’ve done. Okay, it wasn’t quite the same tingly feelings I got when they first gave Rachel the MVP award, but this was still pretty damn great. AGAIN, CONFETTI. AND FINN’S FACE. AND THE LITTLE CURTSEY.
Goodness, this was such a fantastic episode.
Sophy says: THE CURTSEY WAS THE BEST FUCKING THING HOW EVEN. AND THE PANTHER-CRAWLING LOL OH GOD.
I think I’ve expressed most of my feelings about this above, but I thought it was a very neat parallel between Rachel and Tina, and a real shout-out to their eleventh hour relationship last season. Because Rachel needed to be taken down a peg and Tina needed a boost and it was all very symmetrical.
And I love that Tina earned this, you know? Because of what we saw, there really wasn’t any competition (I do wonder how she would have fared if Unique had had her own Marley-less number though). Tina was the stand-out by a mile and it was nice to see her get rewarded for that.
AND THE PINK LEOTARD. I JUST. Did anyone flash back to her in the leotard in Single Ladies?
And Kitty is always amazing and can stay forever. But I admit I didn’t even notice her amazingness in this performance until Rin pointed it out because Tina was just absorbing all of my attention with her amazingness. Oh and…
“That seems a little crazy.”
“No. That seems a little Tina Cohen-Chang. Respect.”
I was SQUEALING, you guys.
His faces are Rophy’s faces.
Rin says: I don’t even know which one to pick as my favourite.
I love that his face stayed in the same open-mouthed awe position throughout Tina’s performance. And yet we needed to include all of them because each one is as special as the next.
Oh Darren Criss, you beautiful naive sophisticated newborn baby.
Sophy says: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH HE DOES HAVE A CERTAIN NEWBORN BABYNESS ABOUT HIM DOESN’T HE. OH GOD I LOVE HIM SO MUCH AND HIS STUPID FACES ARE MY FAVOURITE AND HE THINKS TINA IS SO GREAT AND IT IS SO CUTE.
This is making me remember that time we imitated the Freddie faces for skins-bamfs. I am so tempted. I am so tempted.
Rin says: Oh my god, and he has even greasier hair than Freds. You’ll have to use twice the amount of body lotion this time.
Quinn Glory Shot
She leaves charcoal drawings every morning.
Rin says: Quinn’s in every episode.
You have to know what to see.
Sophy says: COME OUT COME OUT WHEREVER YOU ARE, MS FABRAY.
Rin says: Now I just feel like life is one big game of hide and seek with her.