318 — Choke

Best Song

Santana, Tina, Mercedes – Shake It Out













Rin says: I loved the original of this song, I mean, how can you not? It’s epic and Florence and just a great song. And I wouldn’t essentially call this version better, but it definitely does the original proud.

I love hearing stripped down versions of songs because all we’re really left with is their voices. And Naya, Jenna and Amber together worked so freaking well that I’m upset that it’s taken this long for them to get together in this way. Their harmonies? I had to pause the episode because it was that beautiful and I couldn’t handle it all in one go.

And I am so so so happy that Jenna got a major part in the song too, because she doesn’t get to showcase what she can do enough. And this was the perfect song for that.

BTW. One of my favourite things is that Bieste uses a briefcase.

Sophy says: Absolutely gorgeous. And I agree with Rin, the girls sounded wonderful together. Though I have to say I feel the mix could have benefited from a certain tremulous alto – no really, Dianna has a sweet gentleness of tone that I feel could have woven in really well there. Not to mention, I don’t understand why she would not be involved in the Bieste domestic abuse plotline, other than the fact that they were obviously pulling a Tina with her. There were definite shadows of domestic abuse going on in Quinn’s family back in season 1, and it would have been nice to see that referred to in connection with Bieste’s situation.

Also, I’d just like to take a moment to say how brilliant this was from a story-telling perspective. All the way through the episode I’d been groaning somewhat at Bieste’s dialogue, because it was just so cliched that I was like OH MY GOD SHE’S BEEN STUFFING HER CHICKENS WITH CHEESE. No really, when she was describing her situation and her feelings about it, it was almost as though she was reading from a leaflet, to the point where it made me wonder whether the show, having rightly castigated the girls for making light of domestic abuse, was in fact making light of domestic abuse.

But then we came to this place where Bieste was an inspiration and she was crying and the girls were singing their inspired hearts out and there was hugging and hope and it was all a lie – it was all a facade – because she had given the MOTHERFUCKING FUCKING FUCK FACE FUCK a “second chance”. And that was when all the stilted falseness of her earlier pronouncements made sense – because in reality she hadn’t been processing and sharing and growing and learning – she’d just been going through the motions. And honestly, when I realized that she hadn’t left, that the song of catharsis was, for her, some kind of dirge, and that her tears of gratitude were equally tears of buried shame? One of the most poignant moments on the show.

It helps that Dot Marie’s face does awesome things that make you want to cry with her.

And yes, the suitcase was a briefcase. Epic.

One final thing, I love that they did this plotline with the coach specifically. Because if you were going to judge a book by its cover she’s the last kind of woman you’d expect to put up with getting beaten by her husband. And yet, it makes perfect sense – it fits her often very sad and insecure character like a very sad and insecure glove. And more than that, it subverts expectations and teaches us that it doesn’t matter what you look like or how you present yourself to the world, we are all vulnerable. We can all be manipulated and abused. And even if Bieste could probably right hook Cooter into orbit… it doesn’t mean she’s not as fragile emotionally as Quinn’s petite blonde twin-set clad mother ever was.

Rin says: Yes yes yes yes to all of the above. I also want to join in and say that Dot Marie is amazing and I’m glad she’s getting more to do, because as much as I enjoy her eating whole chickens… it’s so lovely to see her acting her pants off and making us sad with her cryface. And as much as it just plain sucks that Bieste couldn’t get away, and ended up giving dickface another chance, I really think Glee did a brave thing in doing so. Which made me appreciate the storyline that much more. Even though I do feel like Glee is going NUTS with all of their ~issues lately.

I do think Glee were inspired by Nene Leakes though, the actress who plays Coach Roz, as she was a victim of domestic abuse, but now has a charity that fights violence against women. Which I only know because of when she was on The Celebrity Apprentice. Ahem.



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Biggest LOL

“If you don’t have a change of clothes, I have a tent you can wear.”
“I ruined my tent fashioning a neck hole in it.”



Rin says: SHE HAS A TENT SHE CAN WEAR.

AND THEN SHE FASHIONED A NECK HOLE IN IT.

I just. I love the Sue/Bieste relationship.. a lot a lot a lot.

Sophy says: AND WHAT IS SHE GOING TO DO WITH THE CHICKENS, RIN?

THINK OF THE CHICKENS?

Super adorable. And I loved how the moment Sue started letting her serious and decent side show, she was calling her Shannon – not Bieste, not “John Goodman”. Shannon.

Really nicely done.


&
“You and Finn are gonna be great in New York together.”


Rin says: Like. Nothing in the world can sound more wrong than that sentence right there.

Finn/New York just makes me lol.

Sophy says: AAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Rin says: x2


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Best Scene

Deep in space there are giant interstellar clouds. Most of them just float through the universe, content to be balls of gas and space dust, but there are special ones. Maybe they collide with a supernova or are just made up of something extra amazing, but one day they just get too big for the nebulas they’re in and with the sheer gravitational force of their awesomeness, they become a star.

“I am that amazing cloud. My whole life has led to this moment.”











Sophy says: Could it be? Is this the real Rachel Berry I see before me? Did she in fact claw her way out of her Finchel-infested grave???

Not quite. The reference to her fiance being supportive threw the whole montage off and nearly threw my lunch off my stomach. And yet. Whilst I found Finn’s presence in this montage extremely ill-judged, especially given that he’s the only presence – only Rachel’s fiance is allowed to be her support system in this, you guys – not her dads, not her friends, not her Glee club coach, or even her multi-award winning Glee coach bio-mom, just Finn. Only Finn. Because they are everything to each other, you know?

OH GOD MY LUNCH, IT’S COMING AGAIN.

Where was I even going with that ‘And yet’? Oh yes, that’s right. And yet. In another context, say, in the context where Finn was not Rachel’s fiance, where he was not the only one who’s allowed into the montage, where Rachel had not just two weeks ago told him that she’d give up New York for him… in another, better, Finchel context, I would have adored them in this montage. Because LOOK AT THEIR LITTLE FACES? AND THE STOPWATCH? AND JUST?

Those caps are proof that it is simply no longer possible for me to ship Finchel. Because if they can’t win me back over to their side, then nothing can.

But enough. All no-ing aside, how can I stay mad at this utter gloriousness? Lea Michele proved once again why this show would be nothing without her. Every facial expression, every line delivery, every twitch, every pursed lip was pitch perfect – right up to the strange, uniquely Rachel mixture of supreme confidence and fervent nervousness that was You are going to shine so bright on that stage that the sun is going to cry with envy.

Also, Puck’s wink was not only completely hilarious, but made me pretty damn nostalgic.

(Yes, there was a time when I was on board the Puckleberry ship.)

Rin says: Yeah, ‘fiance’ is just.. yuck.

BUT AT THIS POINT I WAS JUST SO HAPPY TO SEE RACHEL, OUR RACHEL BACK OUT IN FULL FORCE THAT I COULDN’T CARE LESS. Her monologues are literally the best ever, and I will never understand how Lea Michele had never tried comedy before Glee. She is ridiculous and hilarious and honestly makes some of the best facial expressions I’ve ever seen.

AND I LOVED THE WRITING. STARS. METAPHORS. AND WALKING BACKWARDS. Amazing.

By the way, the supernova is Quinn Fabray. No further explanation needed.

Also, time for my ridiculous Faberry-stanning of the recap:

Rachel has two loofahs. A blonde and pink one. /shrugs

Sophy says: SHE RUBS THEM ON HER BODY.


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Best ‘Brittany is random’ Moment

“Did he break his hand?”


Rin says: I love a good Brittany is random moment during a serious scene.

Sophy says: I think my favourite thing about this Random Britt is that you’re left wondering exactly how random it was. Because on the one hand it was so inappropriate and lols. But on the other hand… look at her face. LOOK AT HER FACE. She really wants to know if that FUCKING FUCK broke his hand so if he didn’t she can organise some way to do it for him.


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Rophy Says No!

“Please?”





Sophy says: Wow, okay. I have strong feelings about this scene and some of the feelings are a little conflicting, so bear with me.

First of all, I don’t buy this. I just simply don’t buy that Rachel Fucking Berry would choke at this juncture. Because she’s Rachel Fucking Berry, you know? Coming through when it counts is basically a way of life for her. Remember all the times the Glee club was about to fall apart before a performance and Rachel was the amazing glue that stuck everything back together into an amazing shape again at the last minute? Remember, specifically, that time when they were in a rut and nobody wanted to take a risk, and Rachel was there with her competition-winning original song to save the day? I’m supposed to believe that that girl not only choked, but also lacked the courage Kurt had to think outside the box? Please.

This feels very contrived to me. It seems like a cheap attempt to create drama, when we all know that in the real world a girl like Rachel would simply have sung her song and asked where she should go to pick up her enrollment form. More worryingly still, it feels like a way of teaching Rachel yet another lesson about humility, and there is pretty much nothing I hate more than when this show tries to teach Rachel lessons about humility when it comes to her talent and skill. I’m fine with them taking her down a peg or two in other ways, but this just smacks of ‘Hey amazing cloud, you’re not really such an amazing cloud after all. Once you stop thinking you’re such an amazing cloud then you’ll be worthy of this opportunity.’

I really hope that’s not what they’re doing. But I’m rapidly running out of faith with this show when it comes to Rachel.

And you know, the difficulty is that what Whoopi says to her is true: you can’t pull this shit on Broadway. You can’t choke, least of all when it counts the most. So what is the show trying to say? That Rachel’s not as strong as she thought she was? Not as smart? Not as focused? Just not as good?

That’s the last thing I want her to be learning. Ever. She felt threatened by Sunshine’s talent and reacted badly. She was seriously spooked by how great Harmony’s performance was and realised she might be more of a little fish in a big pond than she had thought. She learned and grew from both those experiences. But this is too far. She does not need this. The show does not need this. And okay, I’m just going to come out and say it. What’s bothering me most is that it smacks of tacit misogyny – they reward the cocky, talented male, but punish the cocky, talented female who has worked twice as hard and long to get here, because, you know, the ladies tend to let their emotions get the better of them when the pressure’s on, don’t they?

I’m not usually one to hop on the feminist soap-box. Really, I’m not. But this just feels off to me.

Okay so, to recap, I hate this. And I don’t buy it.

And yet I do buy it. And I also love it.

Hear me out.

Everybody chokes once in a while. Everybody. I was at the Australian Open final in 2009. Roger Federer knows. I know.

So whilst I still question the decision to run with this plotline, particularly in contrast to Kurt’s resounding success, it is possible for even one so brilliant and consistent as Rachel to just screw it up just because.

So it’s horrible, but it is plausible.

And as for loving it? Well… I basically just love it because Lea Michele. She absolutely nailed the panic and smallness and humiliation and disbelief and despair and OH MY BABY NOOOO :((

I actually teared up watching this. Because. “Please?”

I would also just like to say how deeply I resent that the guys cared more about Puck’s test than any of the Glee kids did about Rachel’s devastating experience with her audition. But, you know, the guys cared more about Puck’s test than any of the Glee kids did about Quinn almost dying. So. There’s that.

Rin says: I’m not as angry as Sophy. I’m not saying I liked, or agreed with it, but I think I just jumped to Sophy’s latter train of thought a lot quicker than she did. She was gnashing and I was all, BUT AT LEAST SHE’LL GET TO DO SOMETHING THAT DOESN’T CONCERN FINN.

Unless this is just a huge ploy to show how Finn supports Rachel enough and eventually it’s that, that gets her into NYADA. I will never stop raging if that’s what happens. I may even stop watching.

But I’m hoping it’s not. EVEN THOUGH ONLY A FOOL WOULD CONTINUE TO HOPE GIVEN RECENT EVENTS. But I am a fool. :(

And Lea Michele, I cannot sing you enough praises (I would never sing in front of Lea Michele) for the moment when Rachel’s not given another chance, and she drops her hands and walks forward as she utters, ‘excuse me?’ I love that moment a lot. A LOT A LOT.

ALSO I REFUSE TO BELIEVE that there won’t be a scene where Quinn comforts Rachel and tells her how amazing and brilliant she is and that no matter what she’s going to find her way to New York and make it onto that stage. IF IT DOESN’T HAPPEN, I’m calling OOC.

And god damnit. They all did care more about Puck graduating than Quinn almost dying. INCLUDING TEEN JESUS BY THE WAY.

Sophy says: To be honest it’s already kind of OOC that Quinn wasn’t lurking in the wings somewhere at the audition. Maybe it’s hard to lurk in the chair :(

Rin says: She would find a way. Nothing has ever stopped her before.

Oh and can we talk about that moment where Finn says, “I mean… I just don’t get it. It was a total choke. Okay. So, let’s hop on back to sunny Spain.” ……….WHAT?!?!?!?!?! =)) =)) Next time Finn, try to show that you care even less. The ‘love of your life’ just blew her biggest chance at achieving her dream, everything that she’s spent her life building towards, and your reaction is… I DON’T GET IT. IT WAS A TOTAL CHOKE. OH WELL, SPAIN.

Sophy says: Spain hates you Finn. I called and asked.


&
“I called dibs on all the chicks whose boobs aren’t done growing yet.”


Sophy says: This was not funny.

Rin says: Puck usually never crosses the line. He did here.



&
Not enough frowning in the world can express how upsetting this was.



Sophy says: WE NEED THIS ON ALL THE MILK CARTONS. STAT.

Rin says: I was originally going to write something funny (trust me, it would have been funny..) but I can’t even. NEVER has Quinn Fabray never not been in an episode. And it just feels wrong to not have any excuse whatsoever for her not being there. If she’s supposed to be in physical therapy, WHY NOT just say so? It probably wouldn’t ease my anger in the slightest, but at least we’d know why she wasn’t there and not have to assume it’s because they don’t give a fuck.

They better make this up to us. And also everyone keeps going back and forward on whether or not Dianna is actually officially, 100% confirmed, signed on for Season 4. And we’ve sort of just assumed, and especially now that there have been TWO episodes where she hasn’t had anything to do, that they just wouldn’t do this to Dianna Agron if she wasn’t coming back. They would give her a proper send-off… so maybe on that front it’s a good sign. BUT I DON’T KNOW. I DON’T TRUST THEM. So I’m scared and afraid and angry and cold.

And on that note. It’s downright frustrating that Joe got more screentime than Quinn. That just doesn’t seem right, does it? Because these days it seems like Quinn only gets screentime if it involves Joe or Artie, and yet those guys continue to get screentime without her. UNFAIR.

Sophy says: Co-signed.



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Head In Hands

Yellow. Pants.




Rin says: Kurt’s performance was amazing and perfect and so Kurt. AND HE RIPPED OFF HIS SUIT TO REVEAL SHINY GOLD PANTS. I will never.

Also, I think it’s utterly adorable that the girls were wearing a slightly altered version of their outfit from their first Regionals. It’s just.. IT GAVE ME FEELINGS. =))

Sophy says: The recycled costumes were so adorable – a rare touch of realism from the show. Who knows whether that was the intention or whether they really were just recycling for convenience… either way, I appreciated it.

And yeah, Kurt’s performance was sublime. Hardly a surprise that Whoopi wanted him to come to her artistic bosom immediately.

Rin says: I do want to say that I was pretty upset we didn’t get to see Rachel as Christine though. HER HAIR WAS AMAZING.

AND ALSO, I LOVED TINA’S WHOLE ROLE IN THAT. AND HOW EASILY KURT DISMISSED HER =))

But she got to be in the performance anyway. <3


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Most Rophy

Hurricanes hardly happen..


Sophy says: 8-.

Rin says: 8-.

(If any of you are confused, you need to watch ‘Small Island’ right now.)


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Quinn Glory Shot

Did you really think we’d let you get away with it, Glee?


Rin says: When life gives you lemons…

MAKE A QUINN GLORY WALL.

And by the way? I wasn’t actively trying to make any of them Rachel related. That’s just how a lot of them turned out. IT’S NOT ME, IT’S THE SHOW. None of us made this Faberry shit up you guys, it’s real and it’s happening. Prepare your loins.

Sophy says: This is the best thing ever in the world? Or at least the best thing since that deleted scene in JJ’s s4 episode of Skins…

37 Responses

  1. Ned
    Ned at · Reply

    This ep/me isn’t happening yet. It was odd. I like the wall of Quinns though, that’s nice!

    1. Ned
      Ned at · Reply

      I also liked the very over-the-top happy faces of the band guys in “Shake It Out.” Don’t they know this is a poignant moment? Well, no, they don’t, and of course that points up that the girls don’t totally get what’s going on either. Nice touch.

      1. Ruth
        Ruth at · Reply

        I noticed the overly smiley band guys too. It was weird/hilarious. Brad would not have done that shit!

        1. Ned
          Ned at · Reply

          Hehehe no, Brad is good furniture.

  2. Anna
    Anna at · Reply

    I know it’s an unpopular opinion of sorts, but… I actually really appreciated (not so much liked, that would be insane) Rachel’s choke-storyline. I guess part of that is based on a similar thing happening to myself once, but a bigger part is kind of… I don’t know… a lot of things in Glee are VERY predictable. The Glee club will go here, win this, win that, lose this one to make way for next season, rah. And I think Rachel fell into that category. Rachel with own this number, rule that audition, go to New York. So for the Glee writers (and Lea Michele) to create that incredibly heart-wrenching, desperate, superbly acted moment… it was nice. Excruciating, but nice. I’m curious to see how it’s resolved. Ditto with Puck re: not graduating…

    1. Anna
      Anna at · Reply

      *Rachel WILL own this number. Whoops. Bad typey fingers.

  3. AnnYouBeautifulTropicalFish
    AnnYouBeautifulTropicalFish at · Reply

    You guys, first of, thanks for the fast recap. And especially this: “Sophy says: Spain hates you Finn. I called and asked.” :D

    How can you destroy something as beautiful as “The rain in Spain”?!?! I think, I never really hated a music number before, but this might be the one.

    Where to start though? Quinndependence doesn’t seem to be of any importance anymore. How can you just leave out Quinn Fabray from an entire episode of Glee, yet again?!?! What the F**** is wrong with you Glee? This just had me raging at my computer. I mean, I feel cheated and disappointed. That cliffhanger back in the day was only for ratings and nothing else since nothing has come of it so far. If this really is Dianna’s last season, this is just the worst writing ever. And I have to say, I feel like it’s going to be her last season :'(

    But there was so much wrong with this episode, Quinn not being there was one of the biggest NOs, but the whole Bieste storyline just didn’t sit right with me. I love Bieste and especially Dot, but this storyline just felt so unbalanced. It reminded me of Karofsky’s suicide storyline. Suddenly, we’re supposed to care for a character we haven’t seen in forever. I just didn’t connect with the way they constructed this. First of all, I don’t understand why they have the girls “learn” a lesson about domestic violence and NONE of the male characters on Glee are in any way involved in that learning experience, in fact, they rather leave them alone with their ridiculous saving Puck mission and have them butcher a beautiful musical number. And then there was the “Cellblock Tango” , I love that number, but here its use just felt stupid. The only real reason being so that they could show off an amazing musical number and at the same time make our beloved Glee girls seem unsympathetic and thoughtless. This just felt out of character and extremely stupid to me. I don’t know, this whole thing didn’t work for me. And even though I can totally acknowledge the beauty of “Shake it Out” and Dot Marie’s beautiful face, this whole thing was too much IN YOUR FACE viewer, I hope, you get the lesson. No time to prepare and at the same no time to CARE.

    Moving on. RACHEL, oh my, Rachel. Lea Michele just killed it. Whatever your thoughts might be on the whole choking plot decision, her acting was brilliant and made you feel things. Her devastation was so real. I loved it and even more so the locker scene with Kurt, because you could literally feel her pain.

    All in all, this was another disappointing episode, in my opinion, and it is all due to LAZY and BAD writing. Please show, get better soon, so wen can enjoy what we actually used to love.

    Never give up hope though and keep looking for QUINN!!!!!!! I miss her and a special thanks to Rin for all the QUINNS at the end of your recap :)

    Oh, and I’ll just be playing all these songs in my head until Quinn returns or Glee returns to its old self ;)

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OlKaVFqxERk&feature=related
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kWjJHJFh77Y
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnfSoaJxe3Y

    1. Ned
      Ned at · Reply

      +1 to “Spain hates you Finn. I called and asked.”

      1. Ruth
        Ruth at · Reply

        +2

  4. Whymz
    Whymz at · Reply

    So much about this episode just sat wrong with me. Bieste and abuse was tough to watch. My baby sister was nearly killed by her husband, so making light of that situation hit me so wrong. So did Dot’s face. Lord I almost curled into a ball.

    I agree with Sophy, Quinn would’ve fit perfectly into that trio singing Shake it Out but apparently she got a memo for Sit it Out. UGH!

    The only thing that soothes me is my head cannon, Rophy recaps and chocolate….. Quinn was M.I.A because :
    She was planning a congrats party with Rachels’ fathers. Heard about the audition, and stalked Whoopis’ character to New York to have a little “chat”. I am convinced THAT is why she was nowhere to be found. She had kidnapped and tortured NYADA lady until Rachel was given another chance.

    Also, No one puts Quinn in a corner! Grrrrr

    1. Whymz
      Whymz at · Reply

      Also, the Quinn Glory wall is all kinds of AWESOME!

  5. Nicky
    Nicky at · Reply

    HURRICANES HARDLY EVER HAPPEN! Oh, I’m so glad you put that GIF from Small Island there, because that’s what I was thinking the whole time (I’m a huge Ruth Wilson stan)!

    Sigh. Glee, seriously. What is wrong with you. They can’t just cut Quinn from an entire episode and expect us not to notice! I was enraged. And I have to say, I don’t like what they’re doing with Puck. I mean, the “storyline” kind of makes sense but I don’t like how they’re handling it. He hasn’t had much of a storyline for most of the season (and when he did, it was “Hot For Teacher”, which – …), so I’m disappointed. I don’t know, I don’t think I’ll watch season 4 if Lea Michele isn’t in it (I can’t even imagine it, what would everyone DO all the time? It’s not like the entire show revolves around her, as in every character is closely connected with her, but she is the heart of it, you know?) and they’ll probably bring in a bunch of newbies. This is something I resent Glee for – they keep bringing new characters in when there’s all these chracters from S1 we know nothing about. Ah, Glee. Why are you so frustrating.

  6. Spain
    Spain at · Reply

    Just to corroborate Sophy, she really did call and ask. And even though she forgot about the time difference and woke me up, I did in fact confirm that I hate Finn.

    I am authorised to state that Portugal also hates Finn.

    Also, just for the record, Spain LOVES the Quinn Glory Wall.

    1. AnnYouBeautifulTropicalFish
      AnnYouBeautifulTropicalFish at · Reply

      best comment ever ;)

      1. mandorla
        mandorla at · Reply

        Totally.

    2. Ned
      Ned at · Reply

      O Spain, you and your rainy plains and your justified hatred!

  7. Me
    Me at · Reply

    deleted scene in JJ’s s4 episode of Skins… :O what deleted scene?

    The Coach Bieste scenes are great, but the pace with which her relationship with Cooter escalated is silly. It went from kiss virgin to meeting Cooter to being unable to read the signs to the Cooter/Sue/Bieste triangle to sudden marriage (with no progression) to BOOM domestic violence. I wish Glee dealt with it a bit more…subtlety?

    Though Glee doesn’t do subtlety does it?

    1. Nemesis
      Nemesis at · Reply

      I thought so too, but at least it makes sense that she wouldn’t have known he has a dark side, if she married him right away. And he probably pushed her into it because he’s a sadistic ass who needs a woman who doesn’t defend herself and thinks she won’t be great enough to find another guy. He saw low self-esteem and he attacked. She’s probably not the first victim, too. I have enough friends who got away from men like that and realized that they were just one in a dozen of girlfriends/stalker victims.

      1. Mad
        Mad at · Reply

        Yeah, at first I was like “OK what, suddenly Cooter is a crazy abuser? This just seems like character assassination for convenience’s sake” but then I remembered how he dumped her without telling her for Sue and that was pretty douchey. So I guess it’s not that much of a stretch for him to be even more of a douchebag.

  8. Eve
    Eve at · Reply

    hey, you guys like small island! i also like small island! and exclamation marks!

  9. gabirol
    gabirol at · Reply

    Remember Finn’s erotic performance on that same stage? And now Rachel … poor girl got infected.

  10. Nemesis
    Nemesis at · Reply

    Lovely recap! I’m surprised though that you found Puck’s comment so terrible (most teen girls would fit his category. Only, the Glee girls have their boobs already when they’re “16”, because really they’re all over 20) and at the same time Sue’s comment was oh-so-awesome. “Your husband beats you, now would be a good time to mention that I think you’re so fat, you wear tents!” Why is Sue “serious about domestic violence” again? She shoves students into lockers, risks her cheerios breaking their bones all the time, breaks people down mentally, tries to get her colleagues fired all the time, shoves people down the stairs… I’m gonna get a lot of hate for this, but shoving someone down the stairs is worse than hitting them in the face. (Though of course that guy can burn in hell and doesn’t deserve Beiste and she has to get away from him like yesterday!) But really, if you risk people breaking their bones or getting internal wounds or headwounds on a regular basis, as a teacher, you have no moral ground on this. Sue is the worst when it comes to violence! Also, really, a tent and nine chickens, REALLY? Beiste goes back to the guy because she’s scared noone else would want her, which is what she was in the first place, so making any comments about her figure could just be the last push back towards that violent asshole! What if next time it’s not just a punch?

    And the Rachel thing is just a lead-up to when she’ll get the big competition solo again. Not Quinn, Santana, Mercedes, it’s always Quinn. And always with Finn. (Or, the one time that didn’t happen they replaced them with the other pretty straight white couple. How progressive!) Though probably Blaine now, because god forbid they would acknowledge Kurt’s talent the way they do Rachel’s. She’ll sing, NYADA people will be there, she’ll get in, everyone will hug her, more dramatic cry-singing of Rachel, the end. But I don’T really care because WHOOPI FUCKING GOLDBERG YOU GUYS!!!!!
    But seriously, I would love it, if Santana, or Kurt, or Mercedes got the big competition solo this year. It’s long overdue.

  11. Lu
    Lu at · Reply

    All I could think of was this:
    http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-nF0EoCktrEI/TubHCWvUylI/AAAAAAAAElQ/R_8nZeFNYaA/s1600/Andrew_White_Board.jpg

    Thanks for the recaps, they are awesome

  12. Mad
    Mad at · Reply

    ARGH GODDAMMIT FINCHEL I JUST CAN’T. Unfortunately I have the feeling that the storyline is going to go EXACTLY like that. Finn will help her BELIEVE IN HERSELF AGAIN! Ugh good lord. Go away Finn. Just go. I’m pretty sure Rachel is going to end up going to NYADA at any rate but AGH WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS TO MEEEEE.

    CHRISTOPHER YOU WORK THOSE GOLDEN PANTS. Also Blaine’s faces during that scene, so much win.

    PUCK’S WINKY FACE AHAHAHAHA! Mark Salling just makes me lol. There’s this video one of the cast took of him recently, prancing back and forth saying “being a part of something special makes you speciaaaaal” and clapping his hands and just BAHAHAHA HE IS RIDICULOUS.

    Also, I don’t know if you’ve seen the promo for prom, but I have a baaaaad feeling about the direction they’re going with Quinn’s part in that. Just. Noooooo I really hope they don’t do what I think they’re going to do.

    Yeah, I am starting to get more and more concerned about Dianna being back on the show. I NEED HERRRR. Finn get out, just keep Quinn.

    SCREAMING BECAUSE SMALL ISLAND. SMALL ISLAND IS MY GODDAMMN FAVOURITE. WHAT IS CHIPS.

    Also, random, I just bought Quinn’s American Eagle white corset top, it was on sale. I FEEL SO QUINN-LIKE AND SUMMERY NOW. (this one http://fashionofglee.com/post/20529709367)

  13. Ruth
    Ruth at · Reply

    Sophy, I felt almost exactly the same way about the Rachel-choke storyline as everything you said. I could appreciate the idea of it and on another show it would have worked but with Glee it just pissed me off.

    The cap of Rachel doing her ‘sad’ face is the best ever and the first time anything has made me like Finn in about a year.

    1. Ruth
      Ruth at · Reply

      ok, more stuff i forgot to say.

      I’m really glad they gave Tina stuff to do as well. I really enjoyed her bit in Cell Block Tango and her voice with Santana/Mercedes was orgasmic.

      Also, my love of the Mike Chang/Blaine bromance was taken to new heights with the hair gell stuff. I don’t even know, but it made me so insanely happy. Like, would it have been so hard to have cute friendship moments like this between characters all the way through?

  14. Vanilla
    Vanilla at · Reply

    It’s things like the wall of Quinn that make me love you two, seriously. The lack of Dianna in this episode was a crime.

    But yeah, so many points of rage with this episode that make me wonder what the writers are even doing anymore. I mean, ‘Choke’ could have been something really good in regards to the NYADA auditions, and about how even the best performers can buckle under pressure sometimes but it was all just so heavy handed and blah.

    How exactly is anyone supposed to believe that Rachel would choke sining ‘Don’t Rain’ of all things? This is the song that was belted out on the fly to win Sectionals for crying out loud! Any other song I could have believed, just not this one. And the implication that she choked because she played it safe was just ugh. I have to agree with you on Lea’s acting here though, she sold it so well, it was heartbreaking to watch.

    And of course the boy’s plotline where the audience gets to see just how much all the guys in the Glee group stick together and pull each other through in a lovely display of double standards: ‘Puck might not graduate? ALL NIGHT STUDY SESSION! Rachel might not get into NYADA? *Tumbleweed*’ The lack of concern from Finn here was a double shock and yet not (in that, it’s exactly what I expect of Finn, but at the same time his lack of comapssion just horrifies me).

    Tina getting to sing was really my one saving grace for the episode. She NAILED Shake it out and her parts in Cell Block Tango and it really makes me wish Glee would give her more to do and sing.

    Great recap as ever guys!

  15. dani
    dani at · Reply

    “And okay, I’m just going to come out and say it. What’s bothering me most is that it smacks of tacit misogyny – they reward the cocky, talented male, but punish the cocky, talented female”

    yes a thousand times. this is what pisses me off the most about this show, how guys get to be the heroes the whole time, it’s unrealistic to say the least and makes me wish I could slap Ryan Murphy’s face

  16. Isabel
    Isabel at · Reply

    I SIMPLY CANNOT.

    The Quinn Glory Wall was a godsend.

    I am royally upset that Finn hardly cared about Rachel’s choke. Granted, it wasn’t expected (-MY BABY ASDFGHJKL-) but going to Spain? Best boyfriend ever. EVER.

    /raging

    /is hoping to get quinned even in this quinn-drought

  17. Tammy
    Tammy at · Reply

    I’m scared. I’m scared that it’s because Dianna’s NOT coming back next season that they are leaving her out like this. I’m scared that she’s ready to move on, and that the writers don’t have the sense to give her (us!) the sendoff her character (WE!) deserve.

    So, next time on Glee, Quinn confides in Rachel that she’s nervous about being at Yale with a wheelchair while she’s still going through physical therapy. Rachel confides that she’s completely lost if she doesn’t get into NYADA. They go on a road trip together where Rachel tours the Yale campus with her, mapping out all of the ramps and best routes for her to get to her classes. They take a quick trip down to NYC and Quinn storms into Carmen Thibideaux’s (Whoopi!) office and demands that she gives the most talented singer in America another chance. Carmen is impressed with Quinn’s passionate proclamation of Rachel’s talent and does just that. Rachel sings for her and all is well. On the way out, Quinn pulls Rachel into her lap and as they roll away says, “There are a lot of ramps on this campus as well. That will be good for when I visit.”

    That’s the next episode, right? RIGHT?

    Quinn Glory Wall – the best kind of wall. :)

  18. Rebeccapedia
    Rebeccapedia at · Reply

    SOMETHING BAD IS HAPPENING TO ME. I kind of liked this episode. I liked how Rachel Berry appeared again, I liked Finn trying to be supportive and be a good friend to Puck, (but fuck me I HATE that rain in spain song, childhood nightmares, bad bad bad mermories) I like how Rachel choked because everyone goes through it at some stage, and we all know there’s no way, no possible chance in hell Rachel Barbra Berry would choke on Broadway, or in front of a real audience, or ever really performing, but Rachel is lost, like in the middle of a twister that’s just spinning her where ever it pleases, and this wasn’t really a performance, it was an audition, it was suppose to be her chance to show NYADA how bright Rachel Berry burns and exactly where she fits, but how on Earth is she supposed to know where that is when the twister is flinging her all over the place?! Despite the fact it’s been horribly executed I think the Rachel storyline is meant to be how she’s lost, she does belong on Broadway, she knows that since New York, but maybe that’s not supposed to be her 100%? Maybe she needs like 5% outside life and she’s trying to shove Finn in there? I kind of think that maybe they can work this all out eventually and then we’ll be able to look back and think “Oh that’s what they were doing! I get it now. It’s still bad but I understand!”
    BUT also, yes yes yes to the feminism point, I actually can’t believe they haven’t covered One Direction “What makes you beautiful” before because hello, that song is Glee’s s3 motto for Rachel, YOU’RE HOT BUT WE ONLY THINK YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL WHEN YOU DON’T KNOW IT. That song is the WORST, LISTEN TO THE MESSAGE OF IT AND IGNORE THE CATCHY SHITTY POP TUNE PEOPLE!!!!
    Also I had a guilt spasm after because I didn’t notice Quinn wasn’t there until someone pointed it out.
    ALSO it’s super weird that they had Puck fail, I wonder where they’re going with this, because I really didn’t think he’d be kept on next year, and they could have sucessfully given him the same nice little story to say bye but had him pass at the end, unless they’re going to spin it out into another episode, but that’s annoying too because we’re so close to the end, four episodes left and two are gone straight away on Nationals and Graduation, and the third one with the really, really exciting spoiler I wont mention (although knowing Glee that’ll be a 2 min scene that doesn’t fit into character or plot or basic relevance at all!) and next week is prom so really what are they going to do? It actually wouldn’t surprise me if they just had him graduate like it didn’t matter, maybe if we’re lucky we’d get a throwaway comment like “thank god he passed that make-up test in Holly Holidays history class!”
    OH GLEE, I GIVE UP, I LOVE YOU AND I’M DONE TRYING TO FIGHT YOU. ENOUGH NOW, ENOUGH <3

  19. Rebeccapedia
    Rebeccapedia at · Reply

    ALSO I am 100% positive Whoopi will show up at Nationals and see Rachel sing and let her in because she’s her usual amazing self. Most obvious storyline ever, she’ll know Jessie or something, or maybe she’ll just be there to recruit people, but maybe that’s why I’m not really bothered by the choke, I don’t for a second believe she’s not getting into NYADA next year.

  20. Scattered Letters
    Scattered Letters at · Reply

    “ALSO I REFUSE TO BELIEVE that there won’t be a scene where Quinn comforts Rachel and tells her how amazing and brilliant she is and that no matter what she’s going to find her way to New York and make it onto that stage. IF IT DOESN’T HAPPEN, I’m calling OOC.”

    Rin you are prescient. Quinn does help Rachel feel amazing once again, like the lesbian ninja supernova that she is, when she comes back. Hmm, the comment about Quinn being Rachel’s supernova is truly spot on because… well, that’s probably for the comments section on your recap for the next episode. I can’t wait for your take on Prom and feel free to continue making Quinn Glory Walls.

    Also, of course Rachel has an extra pink loofah, how else can Quinn tell which one is hers? hehe

  21. Daphna
    Daphna at · Reply

    I’m coming out of lurking (first comment ever) to say that that was an amazing Quinn Glory Shot. She’s beautiful and it’s especially obvious when you see all those pics together. I still don’t understand why she wasn’t in this episode.

  22. Mayon
    Mayon at · Reply

    I didn’t want to grant this episode the gift of my comment but your recaps deserve all my comments until the end of time.

    Long live the Quinn Glory Wall!

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